timewasting | OPEN POST 2020.

[ when she's finished reading the article, inej's eyes shift to watch kaz shrug out of his coat and move around the room to busy himself with cleaning, organizing. he's nervous, and he wears it well as he slips papers with secrets into his desk.

wylan and jesper. inej needs to see them, check and see how much money jesper has gambled away, and whether wylan is having any luck in curbing jesper's more problematic traits. but staying with them seems a bit silly, when kaz is here by himself.

besides: ]

I doubt I can move through this city as a tourist.

[ her tone is a bit dry, lips pursing together to hide the smile. even though the wraith may not patrol the city in her spare time on a daily basis anymore, word spreads quickly. no gambling hall or restaurant will treat her like a normal tourist, not when the wraith has come back to ketterdam. ]

And I would rather stay here, if that is okay.

[ she catches his gaze. ]

Someone has to feed the crows.

[ obviously. ]

[ That's probably true. The both of them are too recognizable to move through the streets of Ketterdam without most people knowing who they were. Inej in particular has a reputation that makes the residents of the Barrel in particular very uneasy, her placid looks hiding an array of knives and a silent step.

If he hadn't become painfully aware of where she was all the time, he'd be nervous around her too. Well, ok, he is nervous around her right now, but for entirely different reasons. ]

But your room— [ He hadn't been able to hold onto it, after she left. Keeping an empty room was a bit silly. And difficult, when trying to house as many Dregs as possible.

Wait.

His gaze slides towards the open doorway to his room, eyebrows lifting. ]

Up here? [ If he sounds unsteady it's because he is, breathing going a little funny from the implication. ]

[ she stepped too far.

there were days when existing with kaz was easy, and there were days when it was difficult. today is an easy day, but it's still rife with landmines and the like. walking the tightrope without a net is something she is good at, but mistakes happen, and she has to overcorrect.

she honestly hadn't meant sharing a room with him; taking some corner of the building with a cot was more than enough for her, while the ship was being repaired, and then she could return to her own quarters. no one would be stupid enough to bother her, and she felt more comfortable here -- because even though wylan and jesper were beloved friends, and family, they could both be . . . loud. a bit much. and escaping into nothingness when she needs a break would be something kaz understands, and not necessarily jesper or wylan.

but kaz connects the wrong dots. which was her own fault, really. and inej opens her mouth to immediately correct him and apologize, but something inside her stalls.

inej is patient. but kaz sometimes needs a gentle push. and so she arches her eyebrows, almost incredulous at the insinuation, when she decides to do what she knows will get a result.

goad him.

because he's an idiot. ]

Can the King of the Barrel not get another bed on short notice?

[ read: relax. ]

[ Tense silence stretches between them after his question. He isn't sure what to make of the flicker of her expression, how she starts to say something and then stops, clearly rethinking her words. Every passing second has him more torn about the possibility. It isn't like he's never been alone with her in the room before. Plenty of those times he's been half dressed and oblivious.

Now his mind is jumping several steps ahead, going from sharing a space to sharing a bed and he's thankful he isn't one to blush. And that the dimming light from the window have cast enough shadows to hide any color on his face, if it should show.

Ok, that's enough nonsense. Her verbal prod is enough to stop the frantic trip of his thoughts, pulling him back to the present. Away from wondering what it would be like to press his cheek to the back of her neck. ]

I'll see what I can do. If your things are on the ship, I can have them brought over. [ It's not a long trek from the harbor, but she deserves the rest. ] In the meantime, I've more to do, so you can use this room if you want some silence.

[ there he is.

inej can fetch her own things, but she does appreciate the offer. she'll accept it, once she finishes dealing with kaz brekker . . . who has decided that he has work to do, and is willing to relinquish this space to her if she needs it to decompress.

it's a kind offer, and one that she'll likely take. soon. but for now: ]

Come with me, to the ship.

[ he's not getting away that easily. ]

And pick up dinner along the way. We can eat on the roof.

[ so he can sulk in silence or something, and not be bothered by the general public. ]

[ He might've been trying to escape. It's stupid, as usual, but it's what he has when he can feel himself floundering. They've known each other for years and he feels like he doesn't know her at all in so many ways, the dynamic having shifted so drastically before she left.

Frankly, he doesn't do well with what he doesn't know. His hand pauses halfway to his cane, considering her counter offer. There's a valid excuse to duck away– a pile of papers all clamoring for his attention. Dregs to check in with. Gambling tables to look over.

At the very least, he knows himself well enough that none of those things would actually happen, attention drifting back to the niggling of her presence between his shoulder blades. So he nods, agreeing to the first. The Wraith might be in something of disrepair but he is interested to see what changes it's gone through now that it's been lived in. ]

There's a new place, if we go the long way. [ They've quickly made their way up the list of favored waffle stops as far as he's heard. He'd thought of Inej and Nina when it opened, knowing the latter would've had a detailed report on the exact texture of said waffles. ]

I had it replaced, you won't need to step over those shingles anymore. [ For years, there'd been a few loose ones and they'd have to pick their way carefully over them. After the windfall from the Van Eck job, he'd gotten the whole thing replaced, knowing it desperately needed. He gestures for her to lead on, adamantly keeping his gloves where they are on the desk. ]

[ his acquiescence prompts another smile, and inej moves around the desk toward him, collecting his gloves and coat without a second thought. as if the movement is natural to her, and she holds out the coat for him to take with a smile.

the harbor can be chilly, though the sun is peaking through the clouds today. his coat will probably be needed to ward off the chill. but not the gloves, which are slid into her pocket. ]

Wise.

[ in regards to the replacement of the shingles, which inej has never tripped over, but she's had to slow herself down for kaz once, or twice, or six times. offered a hand many times to make sure he doesn't fall to his death, which was always refused with a stubborn roll of his eyes and a littany of grumbling that inej ignored. ]

We wouldn't want you to fall off the roof.

[ again. ]

[ He takes the coat, draping it over his shoulders for now. And maybe he's a little thankful that she's considered taking the gloves along. His stubbornness in keeping them off for her is likely to backfire. As though diving into the deep end before learning to swim in the shallows.

Opening the door, he lets her go first. ]

I'm not performing that same trick twice. [ Once was more than enough. Still, he doesn't regret keeping the tailor from fixing his leg. It's just who he is, now. Changing the break would feel too weird.

As they make their way downstairs, he's glad that most of the Dregs seem occupied with other activities, the hallways scarce. The first floor is the loudest, with the most coming and going, and he only stops for a minute to leave Anika in charge. She looks like she wants to say something about the whole scenario, but he turns away before any of it can be given voice. No, he really doesn't need anyone pointing out Inej is back, not when it would mean so many of the Dregs clamoring to hear her stories.

There's a ship to see and dinner to be had, after all. ]

Aah, right. A trick.

[ you fell on your sorry ass because you slipped, you jerk.

inej lets kaz handle speaking to anika, and she moves toward the door without much hesitation, for much the same reason as kaz avoids speaking to anyone besides anika on their way out -- she will happily socialize with the dregs, but there is a time, and a place.

and right now, waffles are on the horizon.

she considers drawing her hood as she steps outside, but she doesn't bother as she begins toward the harbor with kaz, keeping pace with him easily. it's a beautiful night in ketterdam. they can take their time.

and now that they're walking, and moving through the city (their city), inej can legitimately answer the question kaz asked her earlier. ]

The sea is beautiful, but unpredictable.

[ she begins there, casting him something of a look, because kaz brekker's track record when inej ghafa experiences anything remotely dangerous that legitimately threatens her life (which is not much) is not a good one. but once she sends him the silent i'm fine, she continues, her tone is warm. ]

We ran into a storm, but we were close to shore. We patched up what we could, and then set sail for Ketterdam. [ and, most importantly: ] The Saints blessed us with clear horizons for the rest of the journey, but the repairs will ground us for a bit.

[ which would be frustrating, if it didn't mean inej couldn't spend time with kaz, jesper, and wylan while here. she desperately missed nina, and promised herself she would sail north. soon. ]

Waffles are hard to find on the open ocean, though.

[ especially good ones. ]

[ For Ketterdam, the weather isn't bad. It's actually approaching the vicinity of good, with no rain in sight and only a smattering of wispy clouds set against the darkened sky. Their path in the Barrel is lit by lamps, the light giving Inej a halo-ing effect when she passes underneath of them.

He really needs to stop staring.

Her silent reassurance works, in part because she knows him so well. And the other part because he's distracted by how good it feels to have her walking alongside him again. ]

Good thing you were so nearby. [ His stomach does an unpleasant turn, thinking about how bad it could've been if the ship had been further out to sea. That isn't what happened though, and he selfishly is glad he'll get to see her for so long. ]

What, can't get the gulls to drop them off?

No such luck.

[ with a laugh; the gulls would steal any waffles away from her even if they could. but Inej shakes her head slightly, moving on easily. ]

She’s a good ship. [ in reassurance, as they walk. the salt hangs in the air, beckoning them both closer as they near the harbor. ] She kept us safe until we got to shore.

[ but it was a good lesson in trusting the skies; Inej won’t run the risk again. ]

Other than that, I haven’t had any trouble. It’s been ... wonderful.

[ truly and blissfully wonderful. ]

[ Truthfully, the gulls were more likely to be dirty little thieves when food was involved. He's seen enough children have sweets stolen right from their fingers while walking along Ketterdam's rocky shoreline. It's an amusing image either way. ]

She had better. [ Kaz you can't threaten a ship??? There is the reassurance, though, that the Kerch generally know what they're doing when they build said ships, their merchants always demanding the best. In this case, it's worked out– Van Eck wouldn't have settled for anything less in his fleet. His insufferable personality is their fortune. Quite literally, in basically every aspect. ]

Inej– [ He starts, hand partway extended, as if he isn't sure of this decision. ] –I'm happy for you.

[ She deserves to hear it. ]

[ there’s only the barest hesitation before Inej catches his hand easily, squeezing his fingers exactly as she had before, offering him a proper grin. ]

I am too.

[ definitively, sure of herself, confident. inej walks with a certainty in her step that wasn’t there before, a brashness, with the knowledge that no matter what happens, her life is her own. And she can choose where she goes, and what she does, and what she wants. everything that happens tonight will be because she wants it to happen, and that is freeing indeed.

but she allows his fingers to slip from hers as they keep walking. he’s free to grab her hand again, but she doesn’t want to push her luck. not while they’re having a legitimately good time. ]

And I’m happy for you, too.

[ because she notices the ease in which he breathes now, without the demon of Pekka Rollins haunting his steps. ]

How have you been, since... [ well. all of that. ] I worried about you, while I was gone. About you being alone.

[ but judging from the halls, and the mentions of wylan and Jesper, maybe kaz hadn’t been so alone after all. ]

[ That first brush of skin is a bit of a shock, even if he knows it's coming. There's no flash of bodies in the water, nor do his knees feel weak. Instead, it's something like a comfort, her fingers warm against his.

This, this he can do. Maybe her newfound confidence is catching, because he does carefully reach for her hand again as they walk. ]

Fine, busy mostly. [ With Per Haskell gone, he had to do some recruiting to fill the gaps. And of course, there was following the entire aftermath of Van Eck's trial, which is still ongoing. Then all the hundreds of things the gang needs in a single day, coming up with new schemes and making sure they go off without too many problems. ]

Wylan and Jes have me over for dinner, sometimes. [ It's becoming something like a routine– at least twice a month either one of them will drag him out of his office. He's stopped protesting it, for the most part. ]

I don't mind being alone, you know that. [ Not strictly true, but he does like his solitude. ]

[ inej makes a mental note to pay wylan and jesper, both a visit and in some amount of money, for being willing to physically remove kaz brekker from his office at least twice a month. it was honorable work, but also dangerous, and they should be paid for their efforts.

inej takes his hand with ease, intertwining their fingers neatly as she continues to talk. it's hard not to smile, at the touch, because she knows it's difficult (on a good day), but it only reinforces that kaz is happy to see her, and that coming back to ketterdam was the right thing to do.

as if there were any other choice. ]

I know. [ and she does, in terms of the solitude. she does too, the bustle of the city and people sometimes being too much. being out of the shadows is a new sensation for her, and while she doesn't strictly hate it, it does feel a little . . . weird.

though she does have to keep an eye out, for van eck, if he somehow manages to get out of prison. she did tell him only once, will he see her again. and while inej isn't exactly the revenge sort, breaking his legs would be too kind, for what that man had done.

but she pushes the dark thoughts of out of her mind, instead continuing to speak warmly: ] But that does not mean being alone is good for you.

[ kaz gets up to no good, when he's alone. and while that's often a profitable business, he no longer has inej to pull him back from the ledge. she's pleasantly surprised that there isn't a stack of dead bodies by the slat, truth be told. such self control and growth from their beloved leader. ]

[ She gets it, which has always been relieving. Inej makes friends much easier than he thinks he ever will, but she understands the desire for silence. And for the occasional need to have some time by herself. Part of that, he thinks, is why she's been such an effective wraith, always making sure she didn't disturb the tenuous quiet spaces.

What he won't admit easily, though, is that he doesn't mind the visits over to Wylan's. The two of them chatter enough to make up for his stoicism. And there's something oddly calming about watching the two of them navigate around each other, how they've gone from an awkward start to knowing so many ins and outs. He's watched Jesper wake early to surprise Wylan, breakfast made exactly how he liked. And Wylan has managed to bully Jes into grisha lessons, curbed his more outrageous need to gamble.

Too many times, he walks away from them feeling wistful, gaze straying to the harbor as he passes. As if Inej will materialize out of the thin air. ]

So Anika likes to remind me near daily. She's almost as bossy as Nina. [ Almost. ]

[ inej's expression shifts slightly, at the mention of nina. not closed off, necessarily, but a bit more somber. she missed nina terribly, and when she saw her again, inej doubted she would ever let nina go. but she hadn't been able to sail up north, to see nina just yet, though she knew nina was okay. soldiering forth. defending her country.

the wraith may not be crawling the rooftops of ketterdam anymore, but old habits die hard, and inej kept an ear to the ground whenever possible, to make sure nina was alive. but when she left ketterdam, inej was sailing for nina.

slavers may not be there, but inej would lend her knives to whatever nina zenik needed. ]

Have you heard from her?

[ the question is quiet, almost resigned. because inej is fairly certain she knows the answer. ]

Nothing from her.

[ He can put together a pretty decent of picture of what she's likely up to, though. Because when Ravka called, she answered, and that country was always a half step away from unraveling. Sturmhond– or Nikolai, rather– hadn't been kidding when he said his back was against a wall.

Kaz could understand the sentiment. Living in the Barrel took a certain kind of cunning and determination to stay alive. Nikolai was trying to do the same to entire dying country. Honestly, he didn't envy him in the least. ]

If she's gone back to work with the grisha, it might be a while before she can safely poke her head up. Ravka is still too unstable.

[ kaz was right, of course, but the weight in her chest was no less heavy for knowing it. perhaps the best way of helping nina was to stay put . . . but if anyone could steal through ravka unnoticed, it would be inej.

she tables the thought for now; it's clear she's lost in her thoughts for at least a few moments, but her vision clears once they near the harbor. the ocean lapping at the docks, and the wraith moored near the end.

the ship, honestly, looks decent upon first glance . . . except the whole missing a mast thing. it's cracked, brought down by the winds, and kind of bolted together through some creative woodworking that inej and her crew had cobbled together. there's also a crack in the hull, but inej doesn't look too bothered, as they come into view of her ship.

she does, however, gently squeeze kaz's fingers, in reassurance, before saying: ]

I think the crew went into town as soon as they were able, so it should be relatively empty.

[ no one in ketterdam is stupid enough to try and steal the wraith. ]

[ She falls quiet and he leaves her to her thoughts, undoubtedly worried about Nina. Not that he isn't—they'd gotten close on the Van Eck job, to his surprise. But Inej had a much closer relationship with the grisha, the two of them practically attached at the hip. Both of them had gone from Ketterdam on their own pursuits. Who knows when they'd be in the same spot again? Hopefully Ravka didn't swallow Nina whole.

Reflexively, when the Wraith first comes into view, his first words are: ]

Where is your mast? [ Okay, she told him they hit some bad weather but this is hard to take in. And well, he supposes there's a mast-like shape. They were lucky to get it cobbled together enough, otherwise they'd be dead in the water.

Those damn saints better keep up the luck, otherwise he's going to have a bone to pick with every single one of them. ]

After a shock like that, I'd want my feet on dry land as quickly as possible, too.

[ ah, well. a better reaction than anticipated.

truthfully, inej had been devastated when the storm passed and the damage was assessed. they were luckily close enough to a port town that inej could pay someone to tow them in, and they had managed to throw together something in order to get safely to ketterdam. but overall, she felt furious with herself that she had misread the skies, that she hadn't taken in sail quickly enough, that she had made a mistake.

once she allowed herself to feel angry with herself over such things, she remembered something crucial, which was: ]

Sometimes you have to learn to fall without a net.

[ and the sea had paid her dearly, for thinking she knew what she was doing. she's still learning, and it was a hard lesson to learn. but her beloved ship will be fine, and that was what matters most.

so inej keeps moving down the dock, tugging kaz along, her hand still intertwined with his. ]

I have repurposed portions of the ship belowdeck, into more living quarters. Temporary, for survivors that need to be brought to port.

[ liberation, for the little girls like inej. ]

No one was hurt, in the storm. Not even the children.

[ so, honestly. a win is a win, in her book. ]

No faster way to learn. [ He says dryly, knowing full well what that's like. In one case, literally. In a number of other cases, somewhat figuratively. His whole entire run in the Barrel has been filled with mistakes, things he learned from as he went.

At the very least, he feels like he's making less of them, lately. It's entirely possible he'll look back on this time in a few years and think he'd been an idiot, though. That is, if he's still around by that point. One never knew in the Barrel. ]

How do they take it? [ Surely, there's relief when they're pulled from slaver hands. But he can't imagine the fear goes away, even with the promise of being returned to homes. He knows even when he had Jordie upon arriving in Ketterdam, he'd been afraid, unsure of what was going to happen. ]

They probably think you're one of those saints. [ He follows her tugging, still warmed by being able to touch her like this. ]

[ no faster way to learn, indeed. but at his question, inej hums to herself, trying to figure out the best way to put it. ]

The first time, I accidentally scared them. [ it's a rueful confession, because while inej has a massive heart, it's also been a long time since she was a child, if she ever was one to begin wtih. and a lithe teenager appearing from nothing from the shadows with a finger to her lips and a knife in her spare hand could inspire fear in even the bravest of men. ] Now, I remove the threat first, before searching the cargo hold for people.

[ "remove the threat" is a lovely way of saying "make grown men beg for their lives and cry for mercy," but inej has always been kinder than most. ]

And I do not think they think that.

[ she knows he's just being himself, but the correction still stands!! as they approach the wraith. ]

I think they are simply grateful to sleep somewhere without chains, until they can return home.

There's already been some grumbling in the West Stave.

[ He's yet to find where the exact discontent is, since it seems to be a generalized sentiment. Good, let those brothel owners be upset. When they inevitably get angry enough about Inej routing all of their plans, he'll ruin them even more. Just like Tante Heleen. ]

Well, that's definitely true. [ He does think she's being too humble as usual. She doesn't know the effect she has on people.

Or maybe he's biased.

As they come up to the ship, he notes more of the damage, frowning to himself at it. Clearly, it's still floating, but the storm had done quite a bit. In his mind, he can practically hear Specht's worry over it all. ]

So then, Captain, give me the tour.

[ the news that there's grumbling in the west stave brings a satisfied grin to her face, and while she doesn't say it, it's clear that inej feels good about that piece of information.

she immediately moves up the ramp onto the wraith properly, bumping shoulders with kaz as they move along the deck. ]

There isn't much to see up here.

[ admittedly; it looks like a normal deck! but she'll move toward a door, to head below deck. ]

I had a secret hold installed that can be accessed through the captain's quarters. [ to hide people, if necessary. ] But other than that, the layout remains the same.

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