timewasting | OPEN POST 2020.

[ It's taken him a lot of work to say things like this to her. Not because he didn't think she deserved it. Quite the opposite—she deserved to hear it as often as possible. A constant reminder that there are people who care about her.

But if there was anything the Barrel was particularly good at, it was quashing any sense of vulnerability. Ketterdam was a harsh place, driven by greed, and the Barrel was all of its worst parts in combination. He'd learned to survive by shoving down the softer parts. The ones that wanted to break down and cry when it got hard. Tears, he'd known, would never do anything for him here.

So, unlearning it all had been an equally as difficult process. Worth it, though, to see her face light up. He kisses her nose as she wrinkles it, mirroring her grin when he pulls away. ]

Good thing you're so forgiving, as that seems to happen often. [ Not nearly as often as before. Still.

He sits back on his heels, fingers tracing along her collarbones and then lingering as he cups her chest, thumbs sweeping along the scalloped edge of her bra. His hips rock forward as he slowly grinds against her, occasionally teasing right at her entrance. As tempting as it is to slide in, he likes this lazy sort of pace. ]

Edited 2020-07-17 00:13 (UTC)

[ the kiss to her nose earns a laugh, and she tips her hips a bit, trying to get that much closer, particularly as he teases her. a hand catches his wrist as he explores her chest, and inej runs her thumb around his palm, her breath catching as he teases her entrance again. ]

Forgiving...beautiful...

[ a hum, as she kisses his palm. ]

Keep going.

[ patient better be on the list, with how he’s taking his sweet time. ]

[ Leaning down, he presses a kiss to the corner of her mouth, trailing back down to her neck. ]

Intelligent. [ Another kiss. ] Dangerous. [ And another, this one ending with a nip at the skin. ]

Patient— [ In spades, really. He blindly reaches a hand down, guiding his cock as he slowly starts to push in. ] —most of the time.

[ No, he hasn't forgotten when she first got back. ]

[ intelligent, that’s a good one, but inej both rolls her eyes and sighs in satisfaction at dangerous, particularly at the nip to her skin. but it’s “patient” that causes a smile in his temple, followed by an indignant jab of her fingers into his sides. ]

I am —

[ but her breath catches, once he begins to enter her, and her sentence is interrupted by a soft groan, her head tilting back slightly before she finishes her sentence: ]

I am the most patient person in your life.

[ and she rolls her hips up to meet his. ]

[ Kaz laughs, a bit breathlessly, when she jabs him, having anticipated a similar reaction. She really is the most patient person he's known. Perhaps aside from his father, but those memories are hazy and incomplete. A child's perspective.

Inej has shown him solid evidence of her patience. How long had she put up with his bullshit until she'd given him an ultimatum—without armor or not at all. And since then, she's been understanding, willing to work through all of his touch problems. Even when he'd been at his worst, lashing out from the self-loathing.

Still, he likes to needle her a little. ]

I said most of the time. [ He sighs quietly as he slides all the way in, the roll of her hips helping it along. For a moment, he just savors being buried deep, hips stilled as he leans down to kiss her. ]

That can be ninety-nine percent. [ Murmured against her mouth, a teasing smile curving his lips up. ]

[ it's really not often that she's comfortable in this position, effectively held down. but tonight is a good night, and she gently brings her legs up, enjoying the feel of the stockings against his sides, as she loosely wraps her legs around his waist. ]

I am always patient.

[ as she returns the kiss, before shifting to press her lips against his cheek. ]

But you -- [ as she rolls her hips again, exhaling at the feeling. ] -- test my last nerve. Frequently.

[ She brings her legs up around his waist and he slides his hands up the outside of her thighs, keeping them right on her knees. ]

I seem to recall some impatience recently.

[ He sighs out a soft moan when she pushes her hips down, his own jerking forward in response. It's not like he's complaining about her recent impatience. Not when it'd involved her shoving him into the nearest chair and crawling into his lap to kiss him.

And truthfully, he'd felt a similar desperation. Eight months was a long time. ]

How frequently? [ His hips rock back and then forward slowly as he tilts his head to kiss her neck, nuzzling affectionately afterwards. ]

[ a hand finds the back of his neck, as he shifts his attention toward her own, her fingers threading through his hair as she tilts her head back into the pillows, letting her eyes close as a soft groan escapes.

but the noise of pleasure ends in a huffed laugh, moving her hips in accordance with his. ]

That you frustrate me? [ murmured; it's a bit hard to string together a thought, when moving like this, but inej focuses, curling her fingers a bit more into his hair. ] Every day.

[ of varying levels, of course. ]

To my last nerve, I would say . . . mmmm. [ her thought trails off as she exhales in a soft noise against his hair, but she soon regains her focus. ] That is a little less frequent.

[ Being pressed so close to her neck, he feels her groan as much as he hears it, the sound settling under his skin. He presses another kiss to her throat, smiling as she lets out a laugh.

Every day? Well, that isn't all too hard to imagine. Kaz has known he has a difficult personality. Over time, he's gotten less difficult. Mostly in the area of actually saying how he feels. Which had been like pulling teeth at the very beginning.

Now he has an easier time of it—how can he not, with how good it feels to say? Or just show, like he does when she threads her fingers through his hair, exhaling a soft sigh.

And although he started this conversation, he's losing interest in the finicky details, much happier to turn his attention to dipping his head further down as he pulls some of the lace of her bra aside, mouth sealing over her nipple. His other hand slips between them, fingers skimming over the lace before rubbing at her clit as he grinds in. ]

[ most of her frustration is really harmless. playful, really. it's actually fairly rare, that he actually frustrates her into legitimate argument. it's usually over something stupid, like being ridiculously overprotective for no reason. or when inej wants to come with, to a matter that concerns the dregs, in order to offer her protection.

that always sparks a fight. one that inej usually wins, mostly because she is going to go anyway. and they have it out afterward, and inej usually wins that fight too. (or, at least, she's more stubborn than he is.)

and sure, maybe she could be considered impatient. she doesn't really consider herself a sexual person, really, but being away for so long had made her miss, desperately, this sense of connection. and she exhales, as his fingers dip lower, her hips tilting upward to give him a little better access. ]

I missed this so much.

[ it's murmured, a breathy exhale, as she lets her eyes close.

she'll acquiesce that much. about her alleged impatience. ]

[ Now that they've had a few days to work out their collective impatience—or whatever one would call it—he's glad to have time to take it a little slower. There hadn't been a chance of such a thing happening when she first got back. Not with months of worry and want built up. He would've been content to hold her for a while, breathing the familiar scent of her hair.

Or maybe he would've worked up to pulling her down onto the bed with him, just as fast as she'd gotten him to take a seat. Of course, he's made up for a couple things he missed in that initial moment. But this is nice too, a steady push and pull, Inej totally relaxed under him. She's tipped her head back and he can make out the happy curve of her mouth, just at the corners. It reminds him of the smile she has when she's soaking up the warmth of the sun, the one he's seen at least a hundred times now but will never forget one of the first; when she'd sat on his windowsill of the Slat.

Ghezen, he loves her so much. ]

I missed you so much.

[ One hand comes to cup her cheek as he straightens up enough to press a soft kiss to her mouth. His hips roll in a little quicker at an angle, fingers rubbing in more determined circles, eager to get her off first. ]

Edited (I forgot my dialogue like a fool) 2020-07-20 21:21 (UTC)

[ another breathy laugh, at his response, before he kisses her, and she hums into his mouth as he begins to move faster, his fingers picking up pace. ]

Did you.

[ breathing uneven, as her breath catches mid-word. she's close, and desperately trying to not be. she's not quite ready for it to end, just yet. but it's harder, to control her breath when he's all-but on top of her. on most nights, the sensation gives her a spike of anxiety. but tonight, for some reason, it causes her to lose control a little faster. ]

How much?

[ it's said in a gasp as she tilts her head back, fingers finding the back of his neck, digging into his hair. ]

Edited 2020-07-21 00:50 (UTC)

[ Her breathing goes uneven and it just spurs him on, intensity going up a notch. While he likes taking his time, it can be hard to hold back for too long. Especially not when she reacts so positively, clearly eager and wholly present. ]

Yes, is that ever a doubt? [ He says, with an amused lilt, before kissing her again, another soft press to her lips. ]

Some nights, I couldn't sleep. [ His thumb sweeps across her cheek, forehead gently pressed to hers. ] It felt like an ache.

[ A tug directly in the middle of his chest, a mix of anxiety and sheer loneliness. It'd been a difficult feeling to come to terms with– he'd felt a similar hollowness after Jordie passed, but the revenge had filled that hole. With Inej, he doesn't have that same anger. Instead, it's just a creeping dread that becomes worse over time, the more time he spends away from her.

He can't describe the relief he feels when he first sees her again. And now he has her for a while longer than either of them are used to, something he sighs about, sliding in deep.]

Edited 2020-07-21 01:30 (UTC)

[ an ache, that's a good word for it. and she feels a familiar pressure pooling in her stomach, her mouth falling open in a gasp, as she tries to figure out how to respond to what kaz said.

words don't really form. her thoughts keep being interrupted. but she knows that she spent more than one night wide awake after a nightmare fueled by another night hunting slavers, and she was in bed alone. and there was no one there, to roll over and hold her closer -- sometimes still asleep, some unconscious part of him always seeking to protect her when she swore up and down she didn't need protecting.

the word ache is a good word for that bottomless sense of despair and loneliness that she felt whenever she was far away from him.

but that thought feels so distant and far away, as she feels herself fall over the edge, her fingers digging in abruptly as a shuddered gasp escapes, the sound drawn out as he moves against her. ]

[ When she gasps, he feels her start to tense up. His thoughts turn away from the time she'd spent sailing, focusing back in on how she feels pressed so close. The spread of her hair on the pillow and how her expression shifts minutely with every push in and out.

Leaning down, he kisses her neck, his one hand cradling the other side of it. And as her fingers dig in, he's coming at the same time, almost unexpectedly. He gasps against her skin, the sound gradually ending in a soft moan. His fingers keep rubbing, a bit gently, working her through the shudders. ]

[ the gasp against her neck causes a shiver to run through her, as his fingers begin to slow. but soon, the movements slow, and the only sound in the room is the soft sound of catching their respective breaths.

she inhales deeply, letting it out slowly as she presses her lips to his temple, running her fingers through his hair as she feels the adrenaline begin to wear off, relaxing into the mattress.

-- and it's in that moment that inej realizes this whole outfit isn't necessarily comfortable, and she's going to have to get out of it in order to sleep, but. you know. that's a problem for future inej, in about five or ten minutes. present inej lets her fingers trail down his arms. ]

[ As her fingers run through his hair, he hums, enjoying the light scratch of her nails. And the kiss to his temple. It's tempting to just stay here, though he becomes distinctly and suddenly aware of how cramped his leg is.

Ah.

Not nearly as bad as it could be, but there's a telltale twinge that tells him he's going to have to be careful about putting his feet on the ground. Pressing one last kiss to her neck, he reluctantly pulls himself away from her. He unfolds his bad leg first as he comes to sit further up the bed, carefully stretching the limb out with a slow exhale. If he sits like this for a bit, it shouldn't be so terrible. Hopefully. It doesn't hurt as much as he's had in the past.

Either way, he leans back against the headboard and relaxes, one finger curling a piece of her hair idly. ]

I like the outfit.

[ she normally protests whenever he tries to do this . . . not because of her own reservations (though, sometimes, inej just really can't be the one underneath someone) but because his leg usually doesn't cooperate. and she's about to ask if he's alright when he seems to move just fine. and inej pushes herself up to sitting too, though she lets him play with her hair. ]

I can tell.

[ murmured, leaning over to press a kiss to his shoulder before shifting to scoot off of the bed, to stand. the distance away from him is already something she dislikes, but she does need to get out of this outfit. ]

I don't think I can sleep in it, so you'll have to have it as a memory for now.

[ she says, as she moves toward the bathroom -- to change, and clean up a little bit before she goes to bed. but she leaves the door open, her voice traveling easily: ]

Is your leg okay?

[ she saw the cringe!!! ]

[ There's a small twinge of pouty loss as she gets up, though he knows she will want to clean up. And take the outfit off, because it just isn't practical for laying about. Still, he just wants to curl up with her.

Which he'll get. Soon. It's a process first.

Really, he should be working up the nerve to get up as well. Maybe wash off and pull on some sleeping pants. But that means getting up and walking and he's a bit loathe to do that right now. ]

I've got a good memory. [ This won't be fading anytime soon. ] It's complaining more than usual.

[ No surprise there. Just means he'll have to keep it stretched out until the muscles relax again. ]

[ she cleans up quickly, running water only lasting for a moment before she unhooks the stockings, pulling them off easily. her underwear is next, followed by the bra. and she idly considers putting on a sleep shirt, but that is in the next room over.

so the underthings get put in a basket to wash later, and inej makes her way back to the bedroom. she lingers for half a moment by the closet, to find sleeping clothes, but soon decides that the bed is a better option. and so she resumes her spot on the bed, tugging the comforter over them both. ]

Will touching it help?

[ with a slight frown, as she rests her head against his shoulder. she does feel a little bad, now. she should've changed their positions before he had the opportunity to tense up. ]

[ He only half listens to her in the bathroom, hearing the water turn on and then off. Mostly, he's focused on flexing his foot, trying to get the muscles to stretch out. By the time she's walking back over, some of the stiffness has started to leave. ]

It'll loosen the tension. Won't do much for the bone.

[ Tilting his chin down, he presses a kiss to the top of her head. ] Don't worry about it. I'll sleep on my other side and it'll be fine in the morning.

[ the kiss to the top of her head is a little mollifying, though she's still frowning to herself. but inej lets it go, recognizing that the fight is not one worth having.

she'll fight over doing dishes, but fights concerning kaz's leg are ones that inej recognizes are usually lost causes.

so instead, she tucks herself closer, careful not to rest weight on his leg, letting her eyes close as she rests against him, still sitting up. ]

We can stay inside, tomorrow.

[ murmured, letting the feeling of relaxation slowly seep through her muscles. ]

[ He curves his arm around her middle, pulling her a fraction closer. In a moment, he'll want to move. If only because right now his head is resting against the backboard.

But she's so comfortable he doesn't want to shift just yet. And having both legs stretched out feels good. ]

We could start planning what we want to do with those empty rooms. [ Mostly, they've been working on the rooms that already have some sort of purpose. It couldn't hurt to think ahead, though.

Sighing, he does let her go (for now), moving to slide deeper under the covers. Before he lies down, he picks up her hand and kisses the palm, liking the familiar roughness. She's used to gripping knives and handling ropes all day, wearing away at the softness that the rich mercher wives aspire to.

He much prefers this. But then, there isn't anything about Inej he doesn't like. ]

[ he kisses her palm, and she wrinkles her nose a little with a smile. and she lets him get comfortable before she slides down next to him. she typically drapes her legs over his, but she doesn't do so tonight. instead, she turns on her side and takes his hand in hers, kissing the back of his hand before she rests her head on the pillow, thoughtful. ]

Maybe a library.

[ that would be nice. they really do have a lot of rooms . . . ]

A guest room or two would probably be smart.

[ He lies on his back for now, legs still stretched out. Normally, he'd stay like this, with Inej curled up next to him, her legs draped over his lap. But it's probably not a good idea right now. Eventually, he'll roll over away from her– his good side, right now– to lie a little more comfortably. ]

Library is a good idea. I do have some books I can add. [ Language ones, mostly. He'd gotten them when he'd been studying Ravkan, which still isn't nearly as fluent as he'd like to be. There's also a few heavy tomes on very specific money laws in Kerch. For reference, of course. He's memorized a lot of them. ]

Two beds are up there, but they don't have to stay in the rooms they're in. [ Man, it's really hard to fill so much space. ] Maybe we can ask Wylan what he did with all those extra rooms.

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