timewasting | OPEN POST 2020.

[ she grins a little at the comment, her hands wrapped around the handles of the bag that contained the multitude of spices she purchased from the women. she rarely gets the chance to speak her native language in ketterdam, and its always a thrill when she finds the opportunity. so she frequents the spice market as much as she can, and brings kaz along so he can practice.

learning shu is her next journey. if she can speak three languages, why not four? ]

They’re lovely.

[ warmly, as they walk along the docks. Kaz had wanted to go for a walk, which didn’t strike her as odd. it’s a relatively nice day, for ketterdam. ]

I think half their business comes from our street.

[ jesper has been buying from them, too. ]

[ There weren't many Suli in Ketterdam, so it was always nice to find someone who spoke the language. He knows it makes Inej more comfortable, hearing it spoken and getting to have a whole conversation with someone who clearly was fluent. It has a different cadence, one he's still struggling with.

At any rate, the visit to the shop had been a fruitful one, in plenty of ways. She looks relaxed as they walk—and really, it's a relatively nice day for one, as Ketterdam goes. Thankfully. ]

At least half. Jesper seemed excited to find something there he hadn't had in a while.

[ Kaz tugs her towards one of the docks, where there's a clear view of most of the harbor and the jut of the Imperjum alongside one of the Tide watchtowers. A ship is slowly making its way in as they get towards the end of the boards, though it's still too far out to clearly see a name. He leans against one of the posts, actually taking a moment to enjoy the breeze and the quiet flutter of the decorative ribbons. And maybe he's trying not to psych himself out of this entire situation. Somehow that little box in his pocket feels like it weighs as much as an anvil. ]

You're expecting the crew back in the next month?

[ he stops to linger, leaning against a post, and inej is pretty sure the reason why is because his leg hurts. he never admits it when they’re walking around, and inej is certain the reason why is because he doesn’t want to stop their nice time. but she lets it go, for now, instead reaching out to adjust one of the ribbons on a nearby post, stooping to pick up a loose flower that fell from the arrangement. ]

That is the plan.

[ as she straightens, twirling the flower between her fingers. ]

They should bring news of lines they’ve disrupted, and whether they were attempting to sell in Ketterdam. And, hopefully, they will take a break.

[ and, idly, inej tucks the flower behind her ear, offering kaz a slight grin. ]

But they will likely just bring trouble.

[ as pirates and sailors are wont to do. ]

[ Even if his leg did hurt, he wouldn't want to stop their nice time. It's too good of a day, mostly in that the weather's held for once. Being so close to the water, it could be mercurial at best. ]

A decent sort of trouble, at least.

[ He returns her grin, knowing exactly how loud they could get when they were bent on having a good time. Not that anyone could fault them for it, especially after so many weeks of hard sailing. And harder work.

Work that she'd started, despite how dangerous. He glances over at her, feeling a familiar swell of affection at seeing the flower in her hair. How the wind picks up some of the loose strands by her ears and the back of her neck. This is it. She is it, something he's known for a while. And while they've been together without worrying over a dumb piece of paper as she likes to call it, there's a not insignificant part of him that wants that.

He sticks his hand in his pocket, fingers curling around the box nervously, turning his gaze out towards the vertical point of the tower. ]

Are you happy? [ The question comes out pensive, clearly a lead to something else. Kaz is fairly certain he knows the answer, but he wants to hear it. There's the same urge he had while doing the Ice Court job—he wanted her approval. Over time, he's just gotten better at asking after it, rather than keeping silent. ]

[ his energy has shifted, and inej’s eyes move to him, brow furrowing at his question. something is on his mind, and the question is . . . not expected. ]

Of course I am.

[ easily, a note of confusion in her tone as she watches him, scanning his features for any indication of what has him lost in his thoughts.

inej is the happiest she has ever been. she has freedom, and a home, and love. family and friends, a purpose. even the bad days are good, if she’s honest.

but that doesn’t explain his question, and she pauses before tilting her head. ]

Are you alright?

[ There's a relief in having a positive answer. An expected one, but a relief all the same. Of course, now she's looking at him like he's just come down with a fever.

Well, it had been a strange question. Especially with no lead up. Because there's no denying that they're happy—Inej would have told him so if that were the case. And he knows this is the happiest he's ever been. Now he wants to add onto that. Just a little. ]

Yes. [ He says, pulling himself away from the dock post and, despite his bad leg (which is currently behaving), gets down on one knee, the little ring box held carefully by his fingers. ]

I want to keep making you as happy as you make me. [ The lid is flipped open but his focus is on her face, dark eyes searching hers. ]

Inej Ghafa, will you marry me?

[ she’s about to point out that he’s obviously not alright because something is obviously bothering him when he kneels in front of her.

and, truthfully, her brow still furrows in confusion. she’s about to ask him if he’s okay, or if he needs help, when she sees the ring box. and, honestly, anything he says after that sort of falls on deaf ears.

the bag she’s holding slips through her fingers, and hits the wooden surface of the dock. a jar rolls out and away, likely lost to the harbor. but she doesn’t seem to care, as she’s fixated on the scene in front of her.

inej opens her mouth, but words don’t come out. and instead of an answer, what comes out instead is: ]

That is what that box was?

[ a little weakly, stunned.

she has found that box in his desk at least six times, mostly shuffling around to get something for him, but always wrote it off as some sort of trophy that he lifted off a mercher that he wanted to keep or sell. ]

[ Really, he hadn't factored in how much of a surprise this would be. Sometimes with Inej it was hard to tell what was going to blindside her. So he's maybe a little shocked when she drops the bag, a spice jar rolling off the dock into the harbor.

And then there's disbelief, because of course she had found it. Though either Ghezen or the Saints were looking out because she doesn't seem to have opened it.

The entire situation is a little ridiculous so he can't help but laugh, some of the tension falling away. ]

Yes, did you think it was just something I'd nicked? [ Oh. ] You did, didn't you.

[ indeed, she didn’t open it, because it wasn’t hers to open. but as the shock begins to give way, and inej realizes what is actually happening —- ]

Of course I did, you are a thief and a scoundrel.

[ in slight exasperation, with a wave of her hands. what other explanation could there be for kaz having a ring box in his desk, aside from that? because inej doesn’t wear jewelry, and he obviously isn’t buying rings for anyone else, so clearly, the answer has to be that he stole it. ]

And a liar —- you, Kaz Brekker, are a liar.

[ she adds, accusingly (though clearly not hurt), because he told her that he hadn’t been thinking about this at all, and that stupid box has been in his desk for at least an eon, so clearly, this has been in the works for awhile.

( she’ll say yes, give her a minute. ) ]

[ Naturally, he grins when she calls him a thief and a scoundrel, finding this bizarrely amusing. Because her shock has worn away some, her usual exasperation making itself known. ]

Oh, would you have preferred me to propose in the kitchen? Or better, with your mother watching?

[ He's betting the answer is no to at least the second question, knowing how mortified she would have been. ]

[ she opens her mouth to tell him off, because he knows damn well the answer to that question, but her eyes flicker back to the ring, and the protest sort of dies in her throat.

because this seems . . . real. and inej slowly sinks down onto her haunches, to be on his level, her exasperation melting into something a little softer. ]

Why do you want to marry me?

[ quietly, watching his face. because she's fairly certain that he's been thinking about this for a long time, but why ask now? why not before? why has he been sitting on this for so long? all of the answers to those questions are likely because kaz overthinks everything, but she wants to make sure. ]

Because I love you and want to give you everything. Officially.

[ There's a bunch of very specific legal reasons, but he won't go into it. Chief among those: in case someone does happen to get the best of him while she's gone, at least she'll get something for it. Instead of the Gemensbank trying to seize it.

Of course, there's also the matter of it mattering to him, for whatever reason. It's a stupid piece of paper, like she's said, but it means a lot. A form of stability, a record, a permanence he hasn't always had.

(And maybe he wants to be able to call her his wife). ]

I shouldn't have waited this long.

[ she watches him for a long moment before gently takes his hands, pushing them down and to his sides so she could kneel on the dock herself herself, taking his face into her hands. ]

You shouldn't have, no.

[ amused, and she leans forward to give him a brief kiss, before she murmurs, his face still in her hands: ]

Because the answer would have always been yes, you idiot.

[ what a moron. ]

I didn't want to do this when you were only in for a week.

[ It's kind of a lot at once. ]

And I might've panicked and talked myself out of it. A few times.

[ He gives her a small smile as he tilts his face towards one of her hands, still feeling a bit of those nerves.

After a moment though, he does take her hand in his. ]

Here. [ As he slips the ring over her finger. It's dainty, unobtrusive. Because he knows she wouldn't want something ostentatious. Nothing that would interfere with a fight, just in case. ]

[ he’s still nervous. and inej is about to call him out on it when he slips the ring onto her finger. and she stares at it for a moment, struck by how beautiful it is. unique, and clearly custom-made, with every attention to detail that she could ever want.

so her teasing immediately softens as she slips her arms around his neck for a tight hug, burying her face into his neck with a laugh. and there might be a slight wobble in her tone, as she says: ]

There has never been anyone else. You had nothing to panic over.

[ before she pulls away only far enough to kiss him, her arms still looped around his neck. and once she’s done that, she grins before sliding her hands down to his chest. ]

Now get up before I have to help you home.

[ his leg had to be killing him by now. ]

Well, you know me.

[ She does, better than anyone else. Which is why she'll probably pick up the mirrored tremble in his answer. Because now everything is catching up, all of his nerves suddenly flooded with a sense of relief. He's not usually one to get caught up in the emotional tide but he'd been holding onto this one for too long.

(As he seems to do with most things. When would he learn?) ]

Alright, alright. [ He does grab his cane, using that to pull himself up from the kneel. And oh, maybe that hadn't been a good idea. It wouldn't have been so bad if it'd gone as quickly as he'd planned but. Sometimes, things got away from him. Kaz winces as he gets to his feet, leaning heavily on the cane, eventually settling back against the post again as he stretches out his bad leg.

Of course, he does lean over to grab the bag she dropped, tilting it so nothing else rolled out. ]

You lost your cayenne.

[ her brow furrows at the wince, but she lets him stabilize himself to set himself against the post so he could stretch. her worry evaporates into a laugh, though, at the cayenne -- indeed, it's lost to the seas.

but she steps forward to loop her arms around his waist, careful not to disturb his leg, with a knowing smile. because she heard the tremor in his voice, and if she knows kaz brekker (and, for better and for worse, she does), he has been obsessing over this for . . . saints, who knows how long. ]

Mm, that is alright. [ easily enough, as she watches him with a slight grin, standing up on her toes to brush her lips against his cheek. ] I have a husband who can replace it for me.

[ she supposes she should care a little bit more, if anyone on the docks sees them, but to hell with them, inej decides. and she can tell, that he's still caught in his head a little bit, and so she shifts her arms to take his face into her hands again, with a warm grin. ]

I said yes, you can relax.

[ teasing a little, maybe. it's good for him. ]

I promise that I am not going to change my mind.

[ She gets on her tiptoes and kisses his cheek, making a small bit of color rise in his face. Whether it's the words or the sentiment behind it, he isn't sure. All he knows is that he's a little off balance in more ways than one. An unexpected thing, really. He thought he had a lid on it but apparently not. ]

Fiancé, technically. [ His correction is distracted, though, wondering if he should be worried about being out in public and doing this. Then again, it's the end of the harbor, there aren't any ships around. And Fifth Harbor is Dreg business. They'll mind their own if they knows what's good for them.

What's more, there's a part of him that dares anyone to say anything. The first result he can think of is that Ketterdam will collectively have more to worry about; they were already practically inseparable and now it's even moreso. ]

Okay. Yes. [ He lets out a breath, giving her a small but crooked smile. One hand comes up to cover her own, his head turning so he can kiss her palm. ]

[ if they were normal people, inej might have been upset, because he's clearly not . . . excited. but they're not normal, and probably never will be. and inej can see he's struggling to put together the reality of the situation, and he's struggling to cope with whatever is inside his head.

so she remains patient, her grin melting into a softer smile as he kisses her palm. ]

I can call you whatever I want, and you are going to have to deal with it.

[ so there, and she runs a thumb over his cheek, eyes bright. he really should be home so he can put his leg up properly . . . and so, she tilts her head a bit, eyes scanning his face. ]

Can I take you home?

[ Her smart remark does startle a laugh out of him, more of the tension breaking. He lets go of her hand to tug her closer by the waist, leaning in for a proper kiss.

There's still finicky details but right now? He doesn't care. ]

Inej, my darling wife, you can take me wherever you'd like. [ his arm loops around her middle, so he can give her a brief squeeze. Later, he'll give her a better hug. ]

But home sounds great.

[ there he is. and she returns the kiss in earnest, wrinkling her nose with a laugh as he squeezes her around the waist, once the kiss ends. ]

Good.

[ warmly, to both statements, and she takes his hand, squeezing his fingers reassuringly. she would loop an arm around his waist to help him up, but best give him the chance to stand, first.

she will offer, though. ]

Come on, let me help you up so you don't follow the cayenne.

[ He plants his cane sturdily and then leans against it as he gets back to his feet. There's a bit of a wobble, his leg still stiff. But he re-balances, squaring his shoulders and handing her the bag she'd dropped. ]

So, there is more to this. [ He says, as they start heading back towards the direction of the Church of Barter. ] It's a bunch of finicky details though.

[ Kaz knows how she feels about that sometimes. The Kerch in particular make her roll her eyes–rightfully so–because of their love of paperwork and contracts. It takes the romance out of it to call getting married signing a contract, quite honestly. Even with as much as he likes that kind of thing. ]

[ oh, his leg is definitely acting up. but inej lets him stabilize himself, taking the bag as he hands it to her before inej loops her free arm through his, to give him extra stability under the guise of wanting to be close. ]

I need to sign something, right?

[ and, indeed, inej doesn’t sound enthused at that, but as they make their way off the docks toward home — ]

Is that at home already? We can sign it and submit it tomorrow.

[ if that was all it took, inej could drop it off in the morning. ]

[ She curls her arm around his and he appreciates the closeness. And maybe a little of the extra balance, though he won't say it out loud. Most of the time he doesn't need the help but he knows it's probably a good idea to have now, since his knee is complaining furiously. ]

We'll have to go to the courthouse. It's not exactly paperwork they let you take home and sign on the line for.

[ Also: ] That's after they verify the Church actually married us.

[ Sorry Inej, this is a process. ]

[ the more he describes it, the more inej’s eyes seem to glaze over. it was partially for this reason that she never really saw the need to bother with marriage. truthfully, she would have been happy with or without it.

but it matters to some people. it clearly matters to him, and inej is willing (more than, really) to tolerate some nonsense in order to make him happy. as per usual.

still, all of this is to say that they need to go to the courthouse. which they can do this week. there’s the matter of the church, but inej is fairly certain a payment or two can satisfy that stupid requirement. kruge rules everything in this bastard of a city.

at any rate, as they walk —- ]

Your people take the romance out of everything.

[ honestly, eloping and running away for a month on an island somewhere for a honeymoon is way more thrilling than listening to some ancient white man prattle on to her about the importance of marriage in a church full of a god that inej finds rather repulsive. ]

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