timewasting | OPEN POST 2020.

[ the first comment earns a soft laugh, but she allows herself to get tugged toward a set of stairs. the stairs themselves cause her eyebrows to arch slightly, because they're the antithesis of the easy flat road they were just walking on . . .

inej knows this city like the back of her hand. and so she knows where the good views of the city are, and where they're lacklustre. she's pretty sure where this staircase leads, but she squeezes his fingers as they begin to climb. ]

I don't mind staying down here.

[ as a reminder; kaz's leg is going to hurt, at the end of all of this. but she takes the stairs carefully, mindful of where she puts her feet. some of the stones are loose, after all. ]

Careful not to fall back the way we came.

I'm always careful.

[ Perhaps not always. The Ice Court had been risk after risk. Sometimes that's all his days are full of, even if he calculates for most of it.

An outcome going awry is always a possibility.

Still, he is careful as he ascends, the stairs occasionally worn away enough in some spots that it proves to be tricky walking. His cane helps more than usual, finding the loose stones or soft spots of dirt before his feet do.

It's a few minutes of steady climbing and relative silence. When they get to the top, it plateaus, more grown over stone and an abandoned half structure with a bench. It had been in moderate disrepair when he'd first found this place and it's gotten worse, a forgotten part of the city.

But the angle is just right to see the curve and jut of the government district, the little peaks of Stadhall and towards the left, the unmistakable spires of Ghezen's hand. ]

My brother and I found this, when we first got to Ketterdam. [ He hasn't been back since, for a variety of reasons. ]

[ the city is truly beautiful, and as the view comes into . . . well, view, inej is struck by how beautiful the city looks like from above. it truly is a beautiful monstrosity, ketterdam, in only the way ketterdam can be.

it's somehow more beautiful in this little abandoned part of the city, a forgotten place that no one goes to. in that vein, it doesn't seem to surprise inej that kaz found this place . . . but as she's about to ask, kaz answers her own question, and her expression softens.

speaking about his family is rare, and jordie even rarer. it makes coming here feel deeply personal, and inej is quiet before she steps next to him, leaning her cheek against his shoulder briefly before gently tugging him toward the bench. he should sit; his leg had to have hurt by now. but as they move toward it: ]

Was it your idea to climb the stairs, or his?

[ For a little bit, he just stares at it all, taking in the sight. His memory of this place is a bit fuzzy but he knows the landscape they're looking at has changed quite a bit since he was here last. More buildings have filled in spots closer to the edge of the government district, though half of that knowledge is simply from living here long enough to have heard about it.

It's not as cloudy now as it was then, he thinks. Nor is he as full of anxious energy or slightly hungry. Inej's cheek on his shoulder shakes him out of the comparisons, reminding him that it's ok to be here.

He doesn't object to being nudged into sitting, lowering himself onto the bench with some relief. ]

His. It was always his idea. I wasn't very adventurous, then.

[ she sits next to him easily, stretching her legs in front of her, crossing them at the ankles. she rests her shoulder against his, watching the city, listening to him speak.

it's moments like these, that she truly craves. jealously guards. moments that she has the opportunity to know kaz in a way other people don't. the thought about an unadventurous kaz brings a warm smile to her face, as she watches the city, resting her head on his shoulder. ]

He sounds like a troublemaker.

[ amused, her eyes on the horizon. it was always his idea speaks volumes, even if kaz doesn't go into detail. ]

I wish I could have met him; I think we would have gotten along.

He used to blame me for all sorts of dumb stuff; chores that weren't finished, nicked sweet rolls. Dad always knew it was him.

[ Back then, it had been a constant annoyance, this older brother who hassled him about everything. Who would somehow laugh it off and they'd get right back to getting along again. To this day, he's not really sure how he managed it.

As she rests her head on his shoulder, he settles his hand on her knee, leaning the slightest bit back. ]

Probably, he was better with people. [ All those friendly skills went into Jordie's genetics and not his. ]

[ the notion of Kaz allowing anyone to think he had done anything is a humorous one, and her lips curved upward, into a faint smile. a younger Kaz doing whatever his older brother told him to do ... ]

You sounded like an adorable child.

[ a bit ruefully; the barrel tends to ruin those. ]

Or perhaps your brother was just that unbelievable, if your brother always took your side.

I was a brat, really.

[ His temper had always been a problem. When he'd crawled out of the harbor, he'd sharpened it to a fine point, used it as a weapon so he wasn't swallowed whole by Ketterdam's lack of mercy. ]

Maybe. He was very easy going. [ Too easy going for a city like this. Kaz stares out towards the water for a moment, thinking about what will never happen. It stings, but it isn't the sharp jab he carried for years—getting rid of Pekka had granted him that, at least. ]

Where are you sailing off to next?

[ kaz is still a brat, is what inej wants to say, but kaz shifts the subject back to her, and she relaxes a bit more against his side, the weight a little heavier. ]

I am not sure. Things have been fairly quiet, around here. Or as quiet as they ever are.

[ it's said after a moment, watching the water. ]

I may sail north, but it depends on the weather.

[ to track down leads. and also to see nina, if possible. ]

[ She leans against him some more and he finds he likes it, her warmth bleeding through his suit coat. Tentatively, he loops his arm around her waist, hoping it will be alright. ]

All the action happened at the front end. [ Now it's just been the day to day stuff, not nearly as exciting as a gang fight. ]

If it stays quiet, maybe I'll go with you some day. [ Depending on whether he can get the Dregs into shape enough that they won't fall apart without him around. He's never considered taking time away, but things have changed. ]

[ it's almost normal, hanging out watching the water near the top of the city. it's almost romantic, if they were the type of people to really care about that type of thing.

the next part, though, is a genuine surprise, and inej blinks before she tilts her head slightly to look at him, arching her eyebrows. ]

You would go?

[ kaz leaving ketterdam for any reason for any period of time is hard to envision, but -- ]

It would mean months on a boat.

[ with. people. ]

[ It's definitely unexpected of him. But, he thinks, he's been in Kerch his entire life—first Lij and then Ketterdam.

(And okay, a brief foray into Fjerda).

The Barrel means a lot to him, especially now that he runs a large portion of it. Just. There's a lot to still see.

Like Ravka. He has no idea what Inej's home country looks like. He's only gotten vague impressions from hers and Nina's descriptions. It's not even that far from Kerch, relatively speaking. Not like the Wandering Isle or Novyi Zem. ]

It would take some planning. [ Though there's definitely a "yes" in how he says it. ] I'm Kerch, Inej, we're practically born to like ships.

[ That's what happens when one's country is a small island. ]

It is not the boat that is the problem I am thinking of.

[ a bit dryly, as she (gently) elbows him in the side for the sass, though she soon returns to resting her head against his shoulder.

she has no real concerns about kaz and touching, on the boat. no one in her crew would be stupid enough to make kaz brekker uncomfortable. but there is little privacy and room, and inej can see kaz quickly deciding sleeping on the deck is preferable than dealing with the close quarters after about a week at sea. ]

But you are always welcome, whenever you would like to go.

Sounds like I'll have to work on some things, then.

[ Not only making the Dregs self-sustainable—though that's been cycling through his head for a while, he thinks he has a pretty good plan in place. There's also the other unspoken part of her worry: close quarters. Her crew seems sensible enough not to touch him on purpose, but it's almost impossible to get by in such a small space without accidentally bumping into someone.

Then again, he didn't always have the third floor of the Slat to himself. So it would be a bit like the earlier days.

There's also a matter of what space he'd be occupying. If it's her cabin, that really left little room for any kind of privacy; not that the crew's quarters would afford him any better. But he could handle that better than being alone with Inej and that ever present tension between them. The one that's here even now, despite how comfortable it feels as he slowly slides his thumb back and forth along her side.

Because there's always that part of him that's greedy, that wants more. That's thinking about returning her kiss. ]

If the crew's too rowdy, I'll come knocking on your door.

[ the movement against her side causes an odd spark of emotion in her. it's hard to describe, really, but inej settles on satisfying. that she can sit like this, with him, and not be worried. not feel the familiar crawl underneath her skin, the urge to get away.

affection without feeling afraid is a wonderful feeling, indeed. ]

You could just stay in my room.

[ kaz shares his room with her, after all. though figuring out how to fit two bed areas in her small quarters is a bit hard. a larger bed might be possible, though. ]

And avoid the conflict.

[ because inej is 100% sure it will result in conflict. at least if kaz is snappish with her, inej has no qualms of putting him in his place. ]

Would there be space?

[ He's seen her quarters, it's fairly small. Well, in terms of a ship it's a lot, given she has a room to herself that doesn't function as any other kind of space. But still. ]

I'm not going to start a fight with your crew. [ Uh. ] Not on purpose.

[ There, that's closer to the truth. He rubs people the wrong way all the time, starting a fight by existing is very possible. ]

[ there's a small snort of laughter, at the slight correction, because it is closer to the truth. there's a reason why people like jesper or nina or the rest of the dregs delicately asked inej to handle kaz, because few people could really push him without being met by a brick wall. or a carefully placed cane to the ribcage. ]

There would be space.

[ to answer his first question, watching the water, the pull of the tides. but instead of detailing out how kaz brekker absolutely would (accidentally or not) prod someone into punching him in the face, inej tilts her head to look at him, curious. ]

Where would you want to go, if you went?

[ There's the usual prickle of annoyance at her laugh, because she doesn't have to agree. But no, she does. And should. His temperament is not exactly friendly and while he doubts he'll ever be anything approaching genial, he can at least try to stop being so pissy over the little stuff. ]

Ravka. You and Nina have told me about it, but I've never seen it. I won't say no to seeing elsewhere. Can't say that trip to the Ice Court was exactly seeing the best of Fjerda.

[ everyone has flaws. what's important is that you love someone despite the flaws they carry.

but at kaz's response, she hums to herself, thoughtful, watching him carefully. trying to envision kaz wandering through ravka . . . but ravka pulls at inej, the urge to go back stronger with the day.

mostly to see nina. inej's people have no love lost, for the constant warring, or the new regime. but nina was worth navigating ravka for. particularly if kaz wants to come along for the journey. ]

So let's go to Ravka.

[ easily. ]

[ He has no real idea what it's like. All he knows of Ravka is from second hand sources; papers, word of mouth. When he'd spoken to Nikolai for the auction, he'd gotten a little glimpse of what the regime is going through to put the country back together and he doesn't envy him in the least. Broke and in debt, war torn and just barely recovering. No doubt being hounded by Kerch to see about repayment.

Still, that's Nikolai's problem and not his. And the curiosity about his neighboring country hasn't waned in the least. Also, spending time with Inej when it doesn't involve Dregs business or being in Ketterdam—it would be good. ]

I'll start putting things in place. Anika's a decent lieutenant but she needs work.

[ she's half expecting him to not call the bluff. after all, they had talked about it. inej had jokingly made plans to include a bigger bed in her chambers, and whatnot. but at the end of every trip, kaz has stayed, and inej has gone.

but as he continues to plan for him leaving for a period of time, her eyebrows slowly move upward. there's no masking the surprise. ]

You are serious?

[ there's also no masking the bare thread of excitement, in her tone. ]

You would go to Ravka?

[ with her. ]

[ She's brought up traveling with him in the past, but it's always been an idle conversation. One that ultimately ends with them joking about her quarters and then moving on. Because when she gets back on her ship, he's the one at the end of the gangway, on solid ground and waving her goodbye.

Some part of him recoils at being on that much open water but...if this is going to be her life, he wants to know what it's like. To share it, in some way. Ketterdam is a decent place to dock and resupply, but it can sometimes be out of the way.

He tilts his head down to look at her, expression serious. ]

I want to see where you grew up. [ So yes, he'll go. ] I can't promise it'll be this time, but soon.

[ The Barrel stabilized faster than he expected after Rollins' forced departure, so most of his work has been making the Dregs as airtight as possible. And maybe a couple expansion projects. ]

[ she allows the words to settle around her, watching him. she's gotten good, at telling when kaz brekker is lying, and when he's not. but he's serious now. an actual plan to leave ketterdam for longer than a few days.

so, after a few moments, she reaches up to mess with the collar of his coat, her tone thoughtful: ]

Kaz Brekker on a boat.

[ it's a nice image. ]

You could make for a decent pirate.

[ the rest of the barrel wouldn't know what to do. ]

Don't let aspect hear you call it a boat, he'll make that one face.

[ Something of a pained expression. Kaz can hear the correction now: a boat is one of those tiny things, this is a ship by all rights. ]

Pirates and thieves are birds of a feather. [ Similar job requirements. Just one roams the oceans.

He lets her fiddle with his collar for a moment before catching her hand, gently pressing his lips to backs of her fingers. Before he can rethink it or give himself any time to react to it. ]

Maybe I'm just eager to let a certain captain boss me around.

[ the kiss to her fingers is pleasant, and warm, and and causes an odd stirring in her chest. but she offers him a grin, at the last comment, eyes bright. ]

Are you?

[ she sounds a bit doubtful, at that -- kaz doesn't let anyone boss him around, even her. on most things, anyway. ]

Everyone scrubs decks, on my ship.

[ she wouldn't make kaz do that with his leg, but he'll be put to work!!! ]

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