[ After a few beats, she seems to relent. Whatever she'd seen on his face had satisfied her enough to know he wasn't going to try anything untoward. A small relief, as he's been called inscrutable by more than a handful of people in his life. Jes says it all the time.
As she pulls out the stack of paper from her belongings, he limps over to take it. Sliding into the nearby armchair, he starts in on the first page, head tilted.
He does glance up, briefly, eyebrows raised in surprise. ]
You taught yourself Kerch? [ No easy feat. It's not like their pronunciations are simple.
His attention drops back to the paperwork, flipping to the next page. ]
People like her don't want their signees informed. They dress it up as opportunity and then they own you.
[ it's not the whole story. she knew some kerch, enough to get by, but it isn't her native tongue. when she was brought here, inej knew enough to barely navigate a basic conversation to buy groceries. definitely not enough to understand the magnitude of what she was now embroiled in.
so she learned. and read books, and magazines, and listened, and forced herself to talk to whatever disgusting bag of puss that came into the menagerie. she would never be taken advantage of again because she no longer understood something.
he's beginning to pour over the paperwork, and something in her itches -- curiosity, maybe. and inej moves a little closer to sit on the couch, tucking her feet underneath her. sitting next to him, sort of -- the armchair is near the couch.
most of what he says makes sense, except: ]
I knew this was not an opportunity.
[ it feels like a silly thing to admit, and inej rubs her arm a little with a frown. ]
[ He says, as he flips to the next page. Learning from reading, rather than formal schooling. Granted, her circumstances had dictated it a huge priority, but it's still an admirable thing. ]
That's the other way they get you. [ His tone isn't unkind. Actually it's inching towards sympathetic, softer than usual. It's so close to what happened with him and Jordie, with Rollins taking advantage of two young boys who didn't know any better. At the very least, they'd had fluency in Kerch—though that hadn't done them any favors.
It makes Inej's situation much more angering, though.
There's silence for a few minutes as he flips through more pages, parsing the dense text solely because he's read enough law jargon over the past decade. At this point, he could probably take the bar and pass. Halfway through a page, he stops, pointing out a section. ]
Here, this is about the debt accrual. [ He folds over the read pages, setting the stack on the arm of the chair and turning it towards her. ] It's made to sound like you'll be able to work off what's owed, but you won't. The interest on it outweighs how much you pay back.
[ he speaks as if from experience, but inej doesn't ask. instead, she watches him pour over the document, her brow furrowed, wondering what, exactly, he is trying to find . . . when he turns the contract over to her, so she can read it. and she shifts a little, to lean forward so she can see the text herself.
his explanation causes inej's eyes to flicker up toward his own, uncertain, before she looks down at the words with this new understanding. she mouths the words silently to herself as she reads before she finally settles back into the couch, looking . . . well, stunned.
she's lost track, of everything she has done for heleen in the name of paying her debt. most of what she has done has been humiliating. in the beginning, inej had been forced into working solely at the menagerie. but heleen had quickly discovered inej had other uses (and an attitude problem), and forced her into doing other work. anything was preferable to the menagerie. she would rather scrub floors for hours than deal with ten minutes of interaction with clientele of heleen's. so inej seized upon any chance she got to avoid that hell. as of late, the money hadn't been enough, and she had been forced back.
eventually, inej had just gotten herself into the mindset of survival. if she gets through this day, she is one step closer to finally seizing back control of her life and leaving this city for good. it made the days spent at the menagerie pass quicker. and her work at the bar gave her the chance to talk to people she didn't hate. like jesper, and kaz, and nina.
but if what kaz says is true: ]
So I haven't paid anything?
[ a bit numbly, as the realization washes over her, her hands settling in her lap. she normally carries herself with a steeled reserve, and maybe a little standoffishness (to some people, anyway), but right now, she looks woefully young and caught off guard. ]
[ The look on her face is concentrated, as she reads through the section he's just pointed out. It's a dense portion, with a lot of word fluff; he's given her the best distillation he can.
As she gets through that section though, it looks like her expression collapses, the realization dawning. He's given people horrible news on their finances but it's never felt this awful. Kaz isn't sure how old she is but she looks young now, fragile.
But he doesn't see the point in softening the blow. She deserves the truth, especially after being lied to. ]
Almost nothing. The wage she pays out isn't enough to close the gap— on purpose. Getting free is either a court case, which can be expensive, or the contract being bought out, which she knows is unlikely.
[ What he doesn't mention is that even if Inej managed to find a lawyer who'd be willing to do it pro bono, it was likely that her contract holder had a very tight legal defense. Purely because of this kind of nonsense. It would take years, as most litigation does, and her life would be more hellish. ]
[ she hears what he says, but it takes a moment or two to process it. the years of "work" that inej thought was whittling away her debt is useless. she's essentially just worked for free. or been abused for free, is probably the better term.
she mulls that over in her head, lets it wrap around her. and slowly, piercing through the numbness is a latent rage that has been twisting around and building in her chest for the last handful of years that she has been trapped in this city. her fingers curl into fists in her lap as she stares at them, nails digging into her palm.
the two options that kaz proposes both seem worthless. she cannot afford either of them, and there isn't any real safety in ketterdam if she disobeys heleen. again. inej is surprised, truthfully, that she hasn't found out where inej is hiding, though inej was at the menagerie today. in some attempt to get back into good graces. or to just get enough money to find another room.
now, though, it seemed pointless. there was no amount of money that would satisfy heleen, so continuing to play her game seemed pointless. if death was the price for freedom, then that sounded like a good deal, to her. there was no paying out the contract, or getting free. inej would just need to run.
where, who knows. but she wouldn't be returning to that place for another moment more. and for a moment, inej considers just . . . not showing up. but something in her, like a taunt bow string, snaps.
so she forces herself to uncurl her fingers from fists, reaching over to collect her phone, unlocking it with a swipe of her fingers as she searches for heleen's number. the motion is automatic, and inej's hands are shaking faintly as she dials, but she stops herself from actually calling. instead, she sucks in a breath, trying to place out what she wants to say . . . but she soon locks her phone again.
think, inej. because acting rashly and out of anger isn't going to get you out of this situation. and once she thinks, she realizes that she doesn't really have much of anything to prove that she's paid heleen anything. venmo transactions for rent, and the contract, and that's about it. and even if inej calls heleen and tells her to go directly fuck herself, it won't fix the problem that heleen owns the rights to inej ghafa as long as she remains in the city.
most importantly: ]
She is going to have me killed if I run.
[ finally, her voice something of a soft whisper. an admission, one that inej doesn't sound too afraid by. that option doesn't sound too bad, in the face of what her life is going to be if she continues to do as she's told. ]
[ It's crushing to watch her go from shocked and numb to furious, her small fingers curling into her palms. He's all too familiar with that kind of rage. There's a similar kind sitting at the back of his throat now, his jaw flexing from the tension of keeping it in.
As she picks up her phone and seems to debate with herself over whether she'll connect the call, he thinks over the options. It's a straightforward answer, one that seems almost uncharacteristic of him. While she thinks, he taps out an email, hitting send by the time she speaks up. ]
[ the question draws her out of her thoughts, and inej glances at him, frowning to herself before she settles back into the couch, letting the phone fall into her lap. ]
Noon, tomorrow. -- at the Menagerie. [ she amends, letting her eyes fall back into her lap. ] I was probably going to be sent home anyway, so going is pointless.
[ and inej sighs to herself before tugging up the sleeve slightly on her left arm, to show a peacock feather tattoo on her forearm, along with a set of bruises that look something like fingermarks.
and, somewhat bitterly: ]
Damaged merchandise doesn't sell. [ the words sound as if inej hears them a lot. inej drops the sleeve again, folding her arms over her middle, her expression edging from frustrated to tired. ] So I was just going to not show up to save her the trouble of the lecture on keeping my mouth shut and doing as I am told.
[ and inej shrugs lightly, offering kaz a faint smile. ]
I'm not very good at doing as I am told, so she has a speech prepared, by now.
[ Tomorrow. Unfortunately a wire wouldn't clear on a weekend, but—oh, well, she isn't going in anyway. Which sort of works out, since he wouldn't advise her to, considering the circumstances.
Of course, her reasoning has less to do with that and more to do with the dark bruising on her forearm. It makes him feel queasy and then angry, mouth pressing into a thin line and fingers curling tight around the top of his cane.
Damaged merchandise. Oh, he can't wait to talk to his lawyer on Monday. He'd already resolved to sink her employer but she just keeps adding layers and reasons to do so. ]
I see. [ Oops, that came out frosty. Attempting to reach neutral, he does get up, phone pinging that their dinner was almost here. ]
[ oh, he's . . . upset. and she watches, legs still folded underneath her on the couch, as he limps his way toward the door, and she turns slightly, resting her chin on the back of the couch to watch him. ]
I'm okay.
[ evenly enough; mostly to maintain neutrality, but also to reassure him that she's fine . . . because he cares, for some reason? who knows. it has been the most bizarre week of her life.
but she soon continues, voice a little quieter, almost thoughtful, when he comes back with their noodles, and as the bag is set on the coffee table, she turns back to face him, watching his face. ]
You are a kind person.
[ her tone is somewhat apologetic, because she had been somewhat standoffish when they first met . . . but there's clearly something about him that cares. at least enough to let her sleep here for free.
but before she says more on that, she changes the subject. ]
[ She says she's okay and he's not totally convinced. But he lets it go, not wanting to push– after all, they don't really know each other too well. He has no idea if pushing would be annoying or not.
And maybe that would put him deeper in the situation than he is already.
Their food is set on the coffee table and he takes the containers out, arranging them neatly and then folding the bag up, sticking it underneath one of the heavier bowls. He takes his seat again, popping the top off of some sesame noodles and carefully stirring them with a fork. ]
You're the only person who'd say so. [ His work certainly wouldn't describe him as such. Nor would most of the people who met him. Jes might, but he'd consider it conditional, which it typically is. Kindness in fits and starts. He's not even sure this could be counted as kindness– he's getting something out of it, after all. ]
[ in regards to people not finding kaz kind. inej knows jesper, at least, would agree. but she takes her own bowl of noodles, stirring them with a fork. they smell delicious, and somewhat spicy. perfect for a cold night.
he also tells her not to worry about the cost, which prompts a slight frown. she makes a mental note to look up the menu later to figure it out, and leave him money once she gets his venmo handle out of jesper.
instead, she continues to stir her noodles, before she says: ]
How do you know so much about people like Heleen?
[ as she twirls some noodles around her fork, moving to take her first bite. ]
You do not seem like the type of person who associates with people like her.
[ He pulls a subtle disagreeing face, the corners of his mouth turning down just enough. She's seeing a very different side of him that most people don't. Or haven't.
Jes, as usual, is the exception.
There's a bit of silence as they dig into their noodles, forks scraping along the bottom of the containers. Somehow, he should've known she would ask about his personal life: she did bare quite a bit of hers. ]
You know Pekka Rollins?
[ He doesn't look at her, twirling noodles on his tines. ]
[ her mind wanders a little, as they eat. wondering what she’s going to do and where she needs to go next. maybe she can barter her way onto a ship . . . but his voice brings her back to the conversation, and her brow furrows in thought.
but it doesn’t take long to place the name. ]
I was told he was nearly as bad as Heleen. Just outwardly nicer about his evils.
[ she says, setting her container in her lap as she watches him, curious. kaz is a stranger to her, but clearly very smart, and capable. it’s hard to envision anyone taking advantage of him, with the presence he strikes.
she pauses before resuming twirling her noodles, her tone quiet: ]
I am sorry, for whatever he did to you.
[ it doesn’t take a genius to put together that kaz has a personal hatred for such things for a reason. so she says it, leaving him room to not talk about it, if he doesn’t want to do so. ]
[ Comparing him to Heleen is one of the better ways to describe him, he thinks. They're both monsters, ready to take advantage of someone if they can get their way, if they can make another kruge with little effort.
While Rollins might not be a problem anymore, he'd effectively ruined Kaz's life for a decade. Longer, since so much of what he'd done still lingers. After all, winning in court hadn't brought Jordie back. Nothing ever would. ]
He won't be doing it again, that's all that matters. [ If his rasp is more harsh than usual, it's no wonder.
Silence lapses except for the scrape of forks in containers, the soft pitter of her bird hopping along her cage bars to entertain herself. ]
[ curiosity nips at her heels, but telling (a tiny part of) her story had been injuring enough, to her own pride. pressing him for details isn't really appropriate, so she lets it go, picking up on the unspoken edge to his tone.
she's content to eat in silence anyway, about to comment that the noodles he picked out for her were delicious when he asks about the bird. and inej's eyes flicker to the cage. ]
She is named after Sankta Lizabeta. [ as she finishes the last vestiges of her noodles, closing the container up to set back on the table. she'll collect the remnants to throw out once kaz is done with his own meal. ] I liberated her from a client of Heleen's. [ liberation sounds better than stole. ] She was in a tiny cage with no food.
[ now upgraded to a larger cage with food, though inej usually lets her hang out in her apartment without the cage. when inej had an apartment, anyway. ]
[ Sankta Lizabeta— he isn't familiar with all the Saint's names but he at least knows of the belief system. Possible grisha who did miraculous works in Ravka, their stories are both wonderful and frightening.
So if Inej is from there, why is she here? He figures he's done enough prying and doesn't ask. ]
Now she has a bird manor. [ Is that a hint of amusement? Maybe. He hides it with a bite of his food. ]
[ she grins a little, at bird manor, and inej rises to her feet to cross to the cage. lizabeta immediately chirps as inej undoes the door and obediently hops into inej's palm, wings fluttering to keep balance as the little bird rests on her fingers.
once lizabeta is situated, she turns to kaz. ]
Here, let me see your hand.
[ as she reaches out to gently take his hand, her touch light and gentle. and once she provides a little bridge for lizabeta, the little bird hops easily from inej's fingers to kaz's, settling herself into a comfortable perch with a chirp, which allows inej to withdraw her hands. ]
I am teaching her how to fly a bit more. . . I think she was in a cage for too long. [ as the little bird stretches her wings a bit, fluffing up to get comfortable before resettling easily on kaz's fingers. ] She likes to sit on the windowsill, when she can.
[ Really, he's never been much for animals. Mostly because before the case, he didn't have the means or the space. And afterwards, he's never had the time. His job is a demanding one, with long hours. He also has a tendency to fill his other time with more work which is...slightly less above board.
Taking care of a pet between all that seemed fairly impossible.
He sets his finished dinner aside on the coffee table as Inej comes over, holding his hand out when she prompts him. Lizabeta wobbles a bit as she balances going from one hand to another, small feet curling around his fingers. She stretches and shakes, fluffed up momentarily before settling. Then she's contentedly preening, small curved beak working to re-situate feathers. ]
Good spot. [ He can appreciate the whole people watching thing. Lizabeta finishes her preening and starts to walk sideways up to his wrist, curiously nibbling at the buttons on his shirt cuff. ]
Probably the quietest bird to exist. Think she picked it up from someone.
[ though lizabeta is very quiet, most of the time, and inej turns her attention to the empty containers, to collect them up. she doesn't have nervous energy, necessarily, but doing something is better than allowing the unknown to seize control again. or not knowing what she's going to do.
besides, hanging out like this is kind of nice.
at any rate, as inej stacks the empty containers to throw them out: ]
But she only speaks when she has something to say.
[ as lizabeta chirps, continuing to nibble at the button before abandoning the pursuit to hop a little further onto kaz's arm, clearly intent on making her way to his shoulder, a higher perch. ]
[ She's not reserved, not like he is, but she doesn't fill the space with chatter. Not like Jesper, who can hold a conversation on just about everything. Normally that sort of thing annoys him but he's known Jes long enough to appreciate his friend's talent for socializing.
It makes up for his awkward silences, at least. ]
Maybe not the singing. [ Well. So far. ] Unless you've been doing that while I haven't been here.
[ As if on cue, Lizabeta lets out a small trill as she flutters the last bit up to his shoulder, head bobbing happily. ]
[ informatively, with a slight grin as she slips past kaz (and the bird) toward the kitchen, so she can deposit the containers in the trash. and once she's done with that, she returns to the living room to sit back on the couch, watching lizabeta make herself comfortable. ]
And I suppose I've always been quiet.
[ with a shrug of her shoulder. ]
I only speak up when something needs to be said.
[ it's a careful difference, between having something to say, and when something needs to be said. she has never been good at keeping her mouth shut when she sees something wrong, or in standing up for herself, which is why she gets into such trouble with heleen. she's never been good at thriving in a cage. which she supposes is something she and lizabeta have in common. ]
That's one thing in common. [ Singing is not his forte. Actually, music in general, he's never had the inclination, though he's been told by Wylan that he'd probably play piano very well.
Inej comes back to settle on the couch and Lizabeta seems to snuggle up further, nearly pressed to his neck. Curiously, she nibbles (gently) at the curve of his ear and he shies away with a startled laugh. The bird bobs her way towards his shoulder and lets out a soft peep of a sound when she re-settles. ]
Or rather, two things in common. [ Three, though he doesn't know it. Neither of them are suited to doing what other people tell them, especially when it doesn't feel right. Or when someone is trying to use them as a doormat. ]
I've had Jes around to fill the space, usually. [ He's dragging him for being chatty, but it's clearly a bit fond. ]
[ her own expression lights up into a proper grin at the sound of his laugh, and lizabeta seems to decide that pestering kaz further is not in her interest, so she settles down to take something of a nap. clearly enjoying her new spot, as she tucks her beak into her feathers. ]
He is good at that, filling up space.
[ amused, as she loosely wraps her arms around her knees, drawing her feet up onto the couch as she watches him, thoughtful. they are an odd pair, together, but compliment each other well -- jesper and kaz, that is. she idly wonders how they even know one another . . . jesper told her that they've known each other for a long time, but no details. which makes sense; kaz seems like a very private person.
all the same, she inclines her head toward the little bird. ]
I was right, though.
[ inej says it as if she already knew this fact, but is letting kaz in on a little secret. ]
You are a kind person; Lizabeta likes you.
[ animals tend to know when someone means them harm, better than humans do. (though lizabeta really hasn't met very many people, so lizabeta's barometer on kindness might be skewed. whatever. ) ]
He's always been good at it. [ A blessing and a curse. Jesper is very good at making friends, his open smiles and exuberant nature contagious.
It's also made him an easy mark for people who want to take advantage of his friendliness. Kaz has had to warn him away from certain dates or people who claimed they wanted to be friends. He's gotten better about seeing the warning signs but he's still more trusting than he ought to be.
(But then, he doesn't know how he feels about Jes becoming as jaded and cynical as he is. It's just not right). ]
I think she just likes having a high perch for once. [ He is much taller than Inej, after all. ]
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timewasting2020-09-27 05:30 pm
no subject
As she pulls out the stack of paper from her belongings, he limps over to take it. Sliding into the nearby armchair, he starts in on the first page, head tilted.
He does glance up, briefly, eyebrows raised in surprise. ]
You taught yourself Kerch? [ No easy feat. It's not like their pronunciations are simple.
His attention drops back to the paperwork, flipping to the next page. ]
People like her don't want their signees informed. They dress it up as opportunity and then they own you.
no subject
[ it's not the whole story. she knew some kerch, enough to get by, but it isn't her native tongue. when she was brought here, inej knew enough to barely navigate a basic conversation to buy groceries. definitely not enough to understand the magnitude of what she was now embroiled in.
so she learned. and read books, and magazines, and listened, and forced herself to talk to whatever disgusting bag of puss that came into the menagerie. she would never be taken advantage of again because she no longer understood something.
he's beginning to pour over the paperwork, and something in her itches -- curiosity, maybe. and inej moves a little closer to sit on the couch, tucking her feet underneath her. sitting next to him, sort of -- the armchair is near the couch.
most of what he says makes sense, except: ]
I knew this was not an opportunity.
[ it feels like a silly thing to admit, and inej rubs her arm a little with a frown. ]
But I had no other choice.
no subject
[ He says, as he flips to the next page. Learning from reading, rather than formal schooling. Granted, her circumstances had dictated it a huge priority, but it's still an admirable thing. ]
That's the other way they get you. [ His tone isn't unkind. Actually it's inching towards sympathetic, softer than usual. It's so close to what happened with him and Jordie, with Rollins taking advantage of two young boys who didn't know any better. At the very least, they'd had fluency in Kerch—though that hadn't done them any favors.
It makes Inej's situation much more angering, though.
There's silence for a few minutes as he flips through more pages, parsing the dense text solely because he's read enough law jargon over the past decade. At this point, he could probably take the bar and pass. Halfway through a page, he stops, pointing out a section. ]
Here, this is about the debt accrual. [ He folds over the read pages, setting the stack on the arm of the chair and turning it towards her. ] It's made to sound like you'll be able to work off what's owed, but you won't. The interest on it outweighs how much you pay back.
[ Dirty. And predatory. He hates it. ]
no subject
his explanation causes inej's eyes to flicker up toward his own, uncertain, before she looks down at the words with this new understanding. she mouths the words silently to herself as she reads before she finally settles back into the couch, looking . . . well, stunned.
she's lost track, of everything she has done for heleen in the name of paying her debt. most of what she has done has been humiliating. in the beginning, inej had been forced into working solely at the menagerie. but heleen had quickly discovered inej had other uses (and an attitude problem), and forced her into doing other work. anything was preferable to the menagerie. she would rather scrub floors for hours than deal with ten minutes of interaction with clientele of heleen's. so inej seized upon any chance she got to avoid that hell. as of late, the money hadn't been enough, and she had been forced back.
eventually, inej had just gotten herself into the mindset of survival. if she gets through this day, she is one step closer to finally seizing back control of her life and leaving this city for good. it made the days spent at the menagerie pass quicker. and her work at the bar gave her the chance to talk to people she didn't hate. like jesper, and kaz, and nina.
but if what kaz says is true: ]
So I haven't paid anything?
[ a bit numbly, as the realization washes over her, her hands settling in her lap. she normally carries herself with a steeled reserve, and maybe a little standoffishness (to some people, anyway), but right now, she looks woefully young and caught off guard. ]
At all?
no subject
As she gets through that section though, it looks like her expression collapses, the realization dawning. He's given people horrible news on their finances but it's never felt this awful. Kaz isn't sure how old she is but she looks young now, fragile.
But he doesn't see the point in softening the blow. She deserves the truth, especially after being lied to. ]
Almost nothing. The wage she pays out isn't enough to close the gap— on purpose. Getting free is either a court case, which can be expensive, or the contract being bought out, which she knows is unlikely.
[ What he doesn't mention is that even if Inej managed to find a lawyer who'd be willing to do it pro bono, it was likely that her contract holder had a very tight legal defense. Purely because of this kind of nonsense. It would take years, as most litigation does, and her life would be more hellish. ]
no subject
she mulls that over in her head, lets it wrap around her. and slowly, piercing through the numbness is a latent rage that has been twisting around and building in her chest for the last handful of years that she has been trapped in this city. her fingers curl into fists in her lap as she stares at them, nails digging into her palm.
the two options that kaz proposes both seem worthless. she cannot afford either of them, and there isn't any real safety in ketterdam if she disobeys heleen. again. inej is surprised, truthfully, that she hasn't found out where inej is hiding, though inej was at the menagerie today. in some attempt to get back into good graces. or to just get enough money to find another room.
now, though, it seemed pointless. there was no amount of money that would satisfy heleen, so continuing to play her game seemed pointless. if death was the price for freedom, then that sounded like a good deal, to her. there was no paying out the contract, or getting free. inej would just need to run.
where, who knows. but she wouldn't be returning to that place for another moment more. and for a moment, inej considers just . . . not showing up. but something in her, like a taunt bow string, snaps.
so she forces herself to uncurl her fingers from fists, reaching over to collect her phone, unlocking it with a swipe of her fingers as she searches for heleen's number. the motion is automatic, and inej's hands are shaking faintly as she dials, but she stops herself from actually calling. instead, she sucks in a breath, trying to place out what she wants to say . . . but she soon locks her phone again.
think, inej. because acting rashly and out of anger isn't going to get you out of this situation. and once she thinks, she realizes that she doesn't really have much of anything to prove that she's paid heleen anything. venmo transactions for rent, and the contract, and that's about it. and even if inej calls heleen and tells her to go directly fuck herself, it won't fix the problem that heleen owns the rights to inej ghafa as long as she remains in the city.
most importantly: ]
She is going to have me killed if I run.
[ finally, her voice something of a soft whisper. an admission, one that inej doesn't sound too afraid by. that option doesn't sound too bad, in the face of what her life is going to be if she continues to do as she's told. ]
no subject
As she picks up her phone and seems to debate with herself over whether she'll connect the call, he thinks over the options. It's a straightforward answer, one that seems almost uncharacteristic of him. While she thinks, he taps out an email, hitting send by the time she speaks up. ]
When's your next shift?
no subject
Noon, tomorrow. -- at the Menagerie. [ she amends, letting her eyes fall back into her lap. ] I was probably going to be sent home anyway, so going is pointless.
[ and inej sighs to herself before tugging up the sleeve slightly on her left arm, to show a peacock feather tattoo on her forearm, along with a set of bruises that look something like fingermarks.
and, somewhat bitterly: ]
Damaged merchandise doesn't sell. [ the words sound as if inej hears them a lot. inej drops the sleeve again, folding her arms over her middle, her expression edging from frustrated to tired. ] So I was just going to not show up to save her the trouble of the lecture on keeping my mouth shut and doing as I am told.
[ and inej shrugs lightly, offering kaz a faint smile. ]
I'm not very good at doing as I am told, so she has a speech prepared, by now.
no subject
Of course, her reasoning has less to do with that and more to do with the dark bruising on her forearm. It makes him feel queasy and then angry, mouth pressing into a thin line and fingers curling tight around the top of his cane.
Damaged merchandise. Oh, he can't wait to talk to his lawyer on Monday. He'd already resolved to sink her employer but she just keeps adding layers and reasons to do so. ]
I see. [ Oops, that came out frosty. Attempting to reach neutral, he does get up, phone pinging that their dinner was almost here. ]
Do you want some ice for that?
no subject
I'm okay.
[ evenly enough; mostly to maintain neutrality, but also to reassure him that she's fine . . . because he cares, for some reason? who knows. it has been the most bizarre week of her life.
but she soon continues, voice a little quieter, almost thoughtful, when he comes back with their noodles, and as the bag is set on the coffee table, she turns back to face him, watching his face. ]
You are a kind person.
[ her tone is somewhat apologetic, because she had been somewhat standoffish when they first met . . . but there's clearly something about him that cares. at least enough to let her sleep here for free.
but before she says more on that, she changes the subject. ]
How much were the noodles?
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And maybe that would put him deeper in the situation than he is already.
Their food is set on the coffee table and he takes the containers out, arranging them neatly and then folding the bag up, sticking it underneath one of the heavier bowls. He takes his seat again, popping the top off of some sesame noodles and carefully stirring them with a fork. ]
You're the only person who'd say so. [ His work certainly wouldn't describe him as such. Nor would most of the people who met him. Jes might, but he'd consider it conditional, which it typically is. Kindness in fits and starts. He's not even sure this could be counted as kindness– he's getting something out of it, after all. ]
Don't worry about it.
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[ in regards to people not finding kaz kind. inej knows jesper, at least, would agree. but she takes her own bowl of noodles, stirring them with a fork. they smell delicious, and somewhat spicy. perfect for a cold night.
he also tells her not to worry about the cost, which prompts a slight frown. she makes a mental note to look up the menu later to figure it out, and leave him money once she gets his venmo handle out of jesper.
instead, she continues to stir her noodles, before she says: ]
How do you know so much about people like Heleen?
[ as she twirls some noodles around her fork, moving to take her first bite. ]
You do not seem like the type of person who associates with people like her.
[ scumbags and thieves, anyway. ]
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Jes, as usual, is the exception.
There's a bit of silence as they dig into their noodles, forks scraping along the bottom of the containers. Somehow, he should've known she would ask about his personal life: she did bare quite a bit of hers. ]
You know Pekka Rollins?
[ He doesn't look at her, twirling noodles on his tines. ]
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but it doesn’t take long to place the name. ]
I was told he was nearly as bad as Heleen. Just outwardly nicer about his evils.
[ she says, setting her container in her lap as she watches him, curious. kaz is a stranger to her, but clearly very smart, and capable. it’s hard to envision anyone taking advantage of him, with the presence he strikes.
she pauses before resuming twirling her noodles, her tone quiet: ]
I am sorry, for whatever he did to you.
[ it doesn’t take a genius to put together that kaz has a personal hatred for such things for a reason. so she says it, leaving him room to not talk about it, if he doesn’t want to do so. ]
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While Rollins might not be a problem anymore, he'd effectively ruined Kaz's life for a decade. Longer, since so much of what he'd done still lingers. After all, winning in court hadn't brought Jordie back. Nothing ever would. ]
He won't be doing it again, that's all that matters. [ If his rasp is more harsh than usual, it's no wonder.
Silence lapses except for the scrape of forks in containers, the soft pitter of her bird hopping along her cage bars to entertain herself. ]
Why Lizabeta?
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she's content to eat in silence anyway, about to comment that the noodles he picked out for her were delicious when he asks about the bird. and inej's eyes flicker to the cage. ]
She is named after Sankta Lizabeta. [ as she finishes the last vestiges of her noodles, closing the container up to set back on the table. she'll collect the remnants to throw out once kaz is done with his own meal. ] I liberated her from a client of Heleen's. [ liberation sounds better than stole. ] She was in a tiny cage with no food.
[ now upgraded to a larger cage with food, though inej usually lets her hang out in her apartment without the cage. when inej had an apartment, anyway. ]
Do you want to hold her? She doesn't bite.
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So if Inej is from there, why is she here? He figures he's done enough prying and doesn't ask. ]
Now she has a bird manor. [ Is that a hint of amusement? Maybe. He hides it with a bite of his food. ]
Alright.
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once lizabeta is situated, she turns to kaz. ]
Here, let me see your hand.
[ as she reaches out to gently take his hand, her touch light and gentle. and once she provides a little bridge for lizabeta, the little bird hops easily from inej's fingers to kaz's, settling herself into a comfortable perch with a chirp, which allows inej to withdraw her hands. ]
I am teaching her how to fly a bit more. . . I think she was in a cage for too long. [ as the little bird stretches her wings a bit, fluffing up to get comfortable before resettling easily on kaz's fingers. ] She likes to sit on the windowsill, when she can.
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Taking care of a pet between all that seemed fairly impossible.
He sets his finished dinner aside on the coffee table as Inej comes over, holding his hand out when she prompts him. Lizabeta wobbles a bit as she balances going from one hand to another, small feet curling around his fingers. She stretches and shakes, fluffed up momentarily before settling. Then she's contentedly preening, small curved beak working to re-situate feathers. ]
Good spot. [ He can appreciate the whole people watching thing. Lizabeta finishes her preening and starts to walk sideways up to his wrist, curiously nibbling at the buttons on his shirt cuff. ]
Probably the quietest bird to exist. Think she picked it up from someone.
[ Her stealthy owner, probably. ]
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[ though lizabeta is very quiet, most of the time, and inej turns her attention to the empty containers, to collect them up. she doesn't have nervous energy, necessarily, but doing something is better than allowing the unknown to seize control again. or not knowing what she's going to do.
besides, hanging out like this is kind of nice.
at any rate, as inej stacks the empty containers to throw them out: ]
But she only speaks when she has something to say.
[ as lizabeta chirps, continuing to nibble at the button before abandoning the pursuit to hop a little further onto kaz's arm, clearly intent on making her way to his shoulder, a higher perch. ]
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[ She's not reserved, not like he is, but she doesn't fill the space with chatter. Not like Jesper, who can hold a conversation on just about everything. Normally that sort of thing annoys him but he's known Jes long enough to appreciate his friend's talent for socializing.
It makes up for his awkward silences, at least. ]
Maybe not the singing. [ Well. So far. ] Unless you've been doing that while I haven't been here.
[ As if on cue, Lizabeta lets out a small trill as she flutters the last bit up to his shoulder, head bobbing happily. ]
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[ informatively, with a slight grin as she slips past kaz (and the bird) toward the kitchen, so she can deposit the containers in the trash. and once she's done with that, she returns to the living room to sit back on the couch, watching lizabeta make herself comfortable. ]
And I suppose I've always been quiet.
[ with a shrug of her shoulder. ]
I only speak up when something needs to be said.
[ it's a careful difference, between having something to say, and when something needs to be said. she has never been good at keeping her mouth shut when she sees something wrong, or in standing up for herself, which is why she gets into such trouble with heleen. she's never been good at thriving in a cage. which she supposes is something she and lizabeta have in common. ]
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Inej comes back to settle on the couch and Lizabeta seems to snuggle up further, nearly pressed to his neck. Curiously, she nibbles (gently) at the curve of his ear and he shies away with a startled laugh. The bird bobs her way towards his shoulder and lets out a soft peep of a sound when she re-settles. ]
Or rather, two things in common. [ Three, though he doesn't know it. Neither of them are suited to doing what other people tell them, especially when it doesn't feel right. Or when someone is trying to use them as a doormat. ]
I've had Jes around to fill the space, usually. [ He's dragging him for being chatty, but it's clearly a bit fond. ]
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He is good at that, filling up space.
[ amused, as she loosely wraps her arms around her knees, drawing her feet up onto the couch as she watches him, thoughtful. they are an odd pair, together, but compliment each other well -- jesper and kaz, that is. she idly wonders how they even know one another . . . jesper told her that they've known each other for a long time, but no details. which makes sense; kaz seems like a very private person.
all the same, she inclines her head toward the little bird. ]
I was right, though.
[ inej says it as if she already knew this fact, but is letting kaz in on a little secret. ]
You are a kind person; Lizabeta likes you.
[ animals tend to know when someone means them harm, better than humans do. (though lizabeta really hasn't met very many people, so lizabeta's barometer on kindness might be skewed. whatever. ) ]
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It's also made him an easy mark for people who want to take advantage of his friendliness. Kaz has had to warn him away from certain dates or people who claimed they wanted to be friends. He's gotten better about seeing the warning signs but he's still more trusting than he ought to be.
(But then, he doesn't know how he feels about Jes becoming as jaded and cynical as he is. It's just not right). ]
I think she just likes having a high perch for once. [ He is much taller than Inej, after all. ]
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