[ her brow furrows a bit more, at his comment. clearly confused, because what does he mean, the money is real. but slowly, her expression shifts from confusion to stunned, her phone loose in her fingers as she nearly drops it into the couch.
she nearly asks him what do you mean, the money is real?, but the words don't quite make it out of her mouth. then, the next question that pops into her head is what were you thinking?, followed by why?, followed by i can never pay you back. but her brain doesn't allow her to actually form the words to speak them, so she just . . . stares, completely stunned.
the shock soon melts into a realization that the reason why heleen is angry is because the contract was fulfilled. which means the proof of payment is real, which means she no longer has any obligation to heleen. she now has an obligation to kaz brekker -- or, well, maybe not. given how viciously angry he had been, over the story. maybe it's just an act of kindness. or another piece to move in his game to deconstruct ketterdam's underbelly.
either way, inej gets to her feet, still wide-eyed and stunned, before she instinctively crosses around the couch to slide her arms around him in a tight hug, burying her face into his chest with a muffled sound that might be a swallowed bunch of tears. ]
[ The room goes silent and he's tempted to leave. Not because he doesn't want to talk to her. It's just—what else does he say? What's done is done. She's free of Heleen and can do what she likes instead of having to put up with someone so thoroughly abusive. They could settle down and talk about what she wants to do with her new freedom after the shock on her face wears off.
Inej, of course, has other ideas. Which involve bolting off the couch and straight into him. Her arms wrap around his middle as she shoves her face into his chest, a wobbly sob cutting through the quiet.
Uh. He should've seen this coming, probably.
Awkwardly, he pats her shoulder, an attempt to comfort. Maybe he should've dragged Jes here before this. But then he'd have to explain himself to his friend and he doesn't know where to start with that. ]
[ he feels uncomfortable, and a thought pops into her head that she probably should have not hugged him. but he pats her shoulder (awkwardly), and inej takes the hint to let him go, though she remains close, quickly scrubbing her face with the sleeve of her shirt. almost embarrassed, as she draws in a shuddered breath. ]
Why?
[ she asks, her question tinged with disbelief as she looks up at him. ]
I can never pay you back, and I --
[ but she bites her tongue, because she nearly adds i am not signing another contract, but kaz doesn't seem like the type of person who would give away all that money without a contract first, if he intended on getting it back. ]
[ He hasn't been hugged in a number of years. Not like she'd just done, anyway. Jesper occasionally slings an attempt around his shoulders in exuberance, but that's a bit different. That is one he's also used to from knowing each other for years.
At least she doesn't linger, scrubbing her face with her sleeve as she sniffles and pulls away. ]
I'm not interested in being paid back.
[ What gives him more satisfaction is the next part. Of course he's glad to be able to get Inej out of that situation, but he's definitely looking forward to razing Heleen's entire operation to the ground. First it'd been Rollins. Heleen was a good second person to go, being equally as bad if not worse. ]
It's paid. [ Though, for the extra reassurance, he pulls out his phone and brings up the email Anika had forwarded on with the information. The attachment has the balance clearly printed, which he tilts the screen to show her. ]
[ reality doesn't actually sink in until he shows her the zero balance on his phone. her heart feels like it's about to pound directly out of her chest as she stares at it in disbelief.
the amount is staggering. higher than it had been when she first started working for heleen. hundreds of thousands of kruge . . . there is no way in any reality that inej could ever begin to hope paying it back. and the tiny flicker of rage that had been building over the last handful of days almost rears its ugly head, but it's quickly overridden by crushing relief. ]
So --
[ saints, she feels as if she has jumped into the ocean and promptly forgotten how to swim. ]
So I am -- I'm free?
[ almost dumbfounded, as she looks up at kaz again, startled. ]
[ He gives her a faint smile, another try at being reassuring, though he has no idea if it's coming across. The shock is still settling in, it seems like. Similar to when he'd gotten the ruling in court, Tomassen standing next to him with a hand on one shoulder, steadying. That day feels like a fever dream, sometimes. ]
There is a catch. [ Kaz puts his phone away, thinking over his words. ] I'm filing a suit against her operations. Right now there's enough evidence to get her heavily fined or jailed—but that depends on whether you'll want to stand in the trial. I can dig deeper if you're on board.
[ Since she likely isn't the only person who's suffered from Heleen's awfulness. ]
[ free. never to go back to the menagerie again. and kaz keeps talking, and inej hears about half of it. something about a court case, getting heleen heavily fined or jailed . . . it's likely important, which is why he is telling her, but the realization that inej never has to go to that hell again is washing over her like a wave.
finally, though, the rest of what he says sinks in. an opportunity to bring down heleen? a miracle, truthfully. and kaz still hasn't answered the question of why -- why he would help her, why would he fight to shut down heleen . . . but the why is irrelevant, really, if kaz isn't interested in being paid back.
or, well. he is . . . in the form of inej helping with this case. which will not be easy. heleen will likely target her, to get her to shut her mouth. and inej really has no idea whether kaz can actually keep her safe, or protect her from much of anything.
not that she needs it, truthfully. she has taken care of herself so far. she can continue to do so. and being careful is a small price to pay for shutting heleen down for good. ]
She bought me when I was thirteen years old.
[ after a moment, setting her jaw when she looks up at him, a steeled expression flickering to life in her eyes. ]
[ He echoes it softly, in disbelief. Not that he imagines she's lying, but just the sheer horror of what happened is a struggle to come to to terms with. No one should have to go through what she has and especially not so young. Kaz thought he'd been jaded enough to expect the worst but somehow this makes his stomach turn.
Maybe, he thinks, it's the idea of the touching. Disgusting.
Shaking his head, he focuses back on the fierce expression on her face. It won't be easy, this case, but she knows that. Knows how truly awful Heleen Van Houden is. She won't hesitate, he thinks, despite the potential danger. ]
There's more research to do. I passed along records I dug up to my lawyer's office this morning. He's fairly sure we'll be able to pin her, though he asked for a copy of your contract.
[ the contract is fine; the lawyer can have it, and shred it, as far as inej is concerned. and she is about to say so when what he says first catches up to her. the tone of disbelief.
what happened to her has been a game of survival for so long that she sometimes forgets how horrifying it is. it's just been . . . normal. surviving, and doing what it takes to survive, and living in this place.
the realization that she doesn't have to deal with that anymore is still sinking in. she doesn't need to go to the menagerie again. she can have the tattoo on her arm removed. she can sleep until noon and do whatever she pleases with her time, her money.
the scars remain, but healing can begin, now. it doesn't change how horrible the beginning was, though.
her steeled expression softens slightly before she reaches out to touch his arm gently, fingertips brushing along his sleeve. ]
[ He can tell she's ruminating. Not necessarily in a bad way. More in a sense that everything was catching up all at once. The paid off contract, the court case, her freedom.
She looks about as stunned as he felt when he'd woken up the day after the verdict. Not quite sure that this was reality but not wanting it to be anything else. There's another layer to the ordeal for her– no longer will she have to go back to the Menagerie to be at the mercy of the hands of rich and disgusting men. She won't have to work two jobs just to try and pay her rent. Every dream she'd wanted and had to put aside were now back as a possibility.
Kaz wouldn't consider him a nice person, but this feels worth it. His gaze tracks from her face to the light touch on his arm, though he doesn't pull away. ]
Shouldn't I be asking you that? First evening of freedom and all.
[ she withdraws her hand after the bare touch, but his works spark an immediate grin, eyes bright. it feels a little more real, when someone else says it out loud. and a laugh escapes, bright and happy and warm.
she can't really remember the last time she laughed. ]
I want to buy you dinner, on my first night of freedom.
[ warmly, as she crosses her arms over her chest, amused. ]
No takebacks. And you have to pick what you want. And you can't purposefully select the cheapest thing on the menu.
[ she doesn't know kaz brekker very well, but she can anticipate that he's exceptionally stubborn, and has refused her money for every meal she's attempted to buy since staying on his couch. what a gentleman. ]
[ Her touch doesn't linger and he's–well, he's a mix of relieved with a strange niggle of disappointment. He's not nearly as bad as he used to be with touch but it's still so precarious, especially with people he doesn't know very well. But somehow, there's a vague sense of longing.
Which is compounded by the delight in the sound of her laugh, full and warm. He can't help the flicker of a smile that curls the corner of his mouth. ]
Bossy, aren't we? [ He isn't bothered. She is, after all, relishing in the chance to flex this particular freedom of choice. ] There's a Zemeni place around the corner called Zoma. The spicy beef stew.
[ spicy beef stew, got it. and she moves to the couch again to pick up her phone to order. as she pulls up the app, she scans the menu herself to pick out what she wants . . . and to also ensure Kaz’s selection is not the cheapest option.
( it isn’t. but this place is also not very expensive in general. )
she pops in the order as she wanders toward lizabeta’s cage, and she lets the little bird hop onto her hand and up her arm before she turns to Kaz with a grin. ]
Ordered.
[ and she meanders back toward kaz, lizabeta eventually settling against her neck, peeping in contentment. Inej soon returns to her seat on the couch, tilting her head back to look at Kaz. ]
This had better not be a dream.
[ she says as lizabeta preens her feathers. ]
I feel like I am going to wake up to reality any minute now.
[ Inej walks back over to the couch to put in the order, concentrated in her scrolling through the menu. It's a reasonable place and something of a comfort, reminding him of dinners over at the Fahey-Hilli residence. He clearly remembers his eyes watering up the first time he had Aditi's spicier cooking, with Jesper laughing and Colm taking pity to hand him a glass of milk.
His food tolerance has greatly improved since then.
As Inej orders, he goes into the kitchen to heat up water for tea, feeling like the chill from outside is lingering. His apartment is fairly well insulated but it's cold enough outside to make the living room feel breezy.
He limps back over when she settles down with Lizabeta, taking a seat in the armchair he favors. Well, it's not like he dislikes the couch. But it feels like it would be too close with the two of them. ]
Think you're safe, most dreams aren't so logical. [ He leans back in his seat, stretching his bad leg out with a sigh. ] If a group of sharks started swimming by, though, that's a good indicator it's time to wake up.
[ she supposes that's true, and her lips curve upward at the comment about sharks. part of her still hasn't really grasped the reality of the situation, but the numbers don't lie. and there's also the question of . . . now what? she had been striving for this moment for so long that it feels a little unreal. and honestly, she still isn't in a really great position now. sleeping on the couch of a relative stranger.
she sits quietly for a few minutes, letting lizabeta walk her way along her shoulders and ducking underneath her hair before the little bird walks back down her arm to settle on her fingers, stretching her wings.
but as the silence stretches on (still comfortable, inej not feeling the pressure to speak), the thought pops into her head again: ]
Why do you want to help me?
[ she asks, her eyes flickering toward kaz, her brow furrowing slightly. testing the waters, a bit. ]
Heleen is going to come for you, too, the minute she finds out this is more than paying off a debt.
[ He can tell she's thinking but he leaves her to her thoughts, instead checking his phone for the text from Jes. How does he want to answer this? Because simply saying he spent tens of thousands today to bail Inej out of her contract seems—strange. In text, at least. He'd rather tell him in person.
So he settles for saying just enough:
Fine. And no, she isn't. It's complicated.
Frankly, that's not too far off. ]
She can try. [ He sends his text and looks up to meet her glance, steady and confident. ] I dealt with Pekka Rollins for almost a decade; bad contract, in and out of courts.
[ If he can stop someone from having to do the same thing, that's worth it. ]
[ ah. she supposes that makes sense, and the story feels . . . a bit more real, now. he's confident, and sure of himself, and he clearly made it out on the other side of whatever bad deal he signed. ]
You can't be much older than I am.
[ after a moment, as she gently runs her fingers along lizabeta's feathers, letting the bird nibble at the sleeve of her shirt. ]
[ They do have to be relatively close in age. It's either that or she has a very convincing fake ID, to be able to work and drink at the bar that Jesper had initially met her in. ]
Twenty, this year. [ So strange to acknowledge. He remembers being fifteen and feeling like he would never make it this far, not under the weight of the case and simply trying to survive. ]
I was nine. [ Jordie had recently turned twelve and neither of them had any sense. That part still aches, always wishing his brother could've seen it all work out. ]
[ ah, so older than she is. a little, anyway. but younger than she was, when whatever happened to him happened. she mulls that over in her head, considering prying a little bit more . . . but something in her tells her to stop. ]
I am eighteen.
[ easily enough; seems fair, to tell him after he told her, after all. she lets lizabeta flutter up onto her head, the little bird poking through her hair with her beak. ]
When is your birthday? [ curiously; mostly to make a mental note. he had said this year . . . so it must not have passed yet. maybe? she can ask jesper. ]
[ She's only a little younger than he is, which is about right to his guess. It does make it worse, that she's been stuck with Heleen for so long. Years of adolescence chewed up by awfulness and a future that could've been much the same.
He wonders what she'll do now. After she celebrates, of course.
Lizabeta flutters the short distance from Inej's shoulder to the top of her head, small beak arranging her hair. It's an amusing picture, one he can't help a slight smile for. ]
January twelfth. [ Recently passed. He'd gone over to Jesper's place and been fussed at by his boyfriend, Wylan. ]
When's yours, then?
[ If it hasn't gone by already, maybe she'll soon be having a first birthday free of Heleen. ]
[ she hasn't thought about her own birthday in a long time. mostly because it's painful. inej is an only child, and her parents used to make a very big deal out of her birthday. which feels like . . . eons ago. any attempt she's made to contact them or try to track them down has either been thwarted by heleen or failed miserably.
she idly wonders where they are, now. or if they miss her. or even know if she's alive. but she quickly shoves that down to shrug a little. ]
Sorry that I missed your extravagant party.
[ a light-hearted joke, because while inej doesn't know kaz very well, she can tell he would rather do literally anything else on his birthday than attend an extravagant party. ]
[ Born in the summer. Somehow, that seems fitting. Her personality is certainly very positive and sunny, despite the absolutely shitty circumstances she's been living with. ]
Too bad, it was the talk of the town. Chocolate fountains, champagne, the works.
[ Ugh. He would never. It's an egregious amount of money for no reason. Sure he can be glad he's made it another year but that's less about celebrating a birth and more about the survival aspect. Inej seems to understand he doesn't care for the extravagance, at least. ]
Maybe so. [ He takes a seat in the chair nearby, stretching his legs out, the toe of one shoe close to her feet. Technically, it's easier to stretch out on the other side of the couch, where he wouldn't be almost touching her, but that would also put him closer, generally. It's easier to talk to her this way anyway. ]
[ chocolate fountains . . . the image sparks a grin, and she watches him stretch out. clearly trying to get comfortable with his bad leg, and inej considers offering to get him something that might help, but she decides against it. he seems like a proud person.
lizabeta makes herself comfortable on top of inej's head, and inej considers his question, settling back into the corner of the couch. ]
I don't know.
[ it's an honest answer, crossing her legs at her ankles. there's a million things to consider, and things to do. to sort through. to process. heal. her first thought is to go to ravka, to find her parents, but . . . how would she even do that?
she has to finish her business here, first. ]
I don't really have anywhere to go. [ admittedly, with a shrug of her shoulders, as lizabeta hops back down, fluttering to land on inej's lap. ] So I have to figure that out, first.
[ she pauses, though, her eyes flickering to his leg before her gaze meets his, inclining her head toward the couch. ]
You would probably be more comfortable if you laid down on the couch.
[ It is a bit early to ask, after all, so it's hardly a surprise when she says she doesn't know what she'll do. Being in Heleen's employ meant surviving and thinking of nothing else but getting through to the next day. At least, that is how it'd felt for him when he was up against Rollins.
Now she has so much choice it's likely to be overwhelming. Especially as she still processes the whole situation.
Though, she does start with the practical end: where she'll stay. ]
If you want to stay here in the meantime. [ Kaz gives her a half-shrug from where he's practically slouched down in his seat. ]
Technically, it's not long enough.
[ There's a way to make it work. But really, he doesn't want to kick her off the couch out of a probably stupid sense of pride. ]
[ he's ridiculously tall. or, well, maybe he isn't, and she's just short. he's not as tall as jesper, or quite so lanky, though you wouldn't know it by how slouched he is in the armchair. which looks very uncomfortable. ]
I think I have been enough of a burden; I don't want to continue being in your way.
[ and inej unfolds her legs to get up under the guise of stretching . . . before she moves to sit in the chair opposite him, arching her eyebrows in his direction. ]
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timewasting2020-09-27 05:30 pm
no subject
she nearly asks him what do you mean, the money is real?, but the words don't quite make it out of her mouth. then, the next question that pops into her head is what were you thinking?, followed by why?, followed by i can never pay you back. but her brain doesn't allow her to actually form the words to speak them, so she just . . . stares, completely stunned.
the shock soon melts into a realization that the reason why heleen is angry is because the contract was fulfilled. which means the proof of payment is real, which means she no longer has any obligation to heleen. she now has an obligation to kaz brekker -- or, well, maybe not. given how viciously angry he had been, over the story. maybe it's just an act of kindness. or another piece to move in his game to deconstruct ketterdam's underbelly.
either way, inej gets to her feet, still wide-eyed and stunned, before she instinctively crosses around the couch to slide her arms around him in a tight hug, burying her face into his chest with a muffled sound that might be a swallowed bunch of tears. ]
no subject
Inej, of course, has other ideas. Which involve bolting off the couch and straight into him. Her arms wrap around his middle as she shoves her face into his chest, a wobbly sob cutting through the quiet.
Uh. He should've seen this coming, probably.
Awkwardly, he pats her shoulder, an attempt to comfort. Maybe he should've dragged Jes here before this. But then he'd have to explain himself to his friend and he doesn't know where to start with that. ]
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Why?
[ she asks, her question tinged with disbelief as she looks up at him. ]
I can never pay you back, and I --
[ but she bites her tongue, because she nearly adds i am not signing another contract, but kaz doesn't seem like the type of person who would give away all that money without a contract first, if he intended on getting it back. ]
-- is it actually paid?
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At least she doesn't linger, scrubbing her face with her sleeve as she sniffles and pulls away. ]
I'm not interested in being paid back.
[ What gives him more satisfaction is the next part. Of course he's glad to be able to get Inej out of that situation, but he's definitely looking forward to razing Heleen's entire operation to the ground. First it'd been Rollins. Heleen was a good second person to go, being equally as bad if not worse. ]
It's paid. [ Though, for the extra reassurance, he pulls out his phone and brings up the email Anika had forwarded on with the information. The attachment has the balance clearly printed, which he tilts the screen to show her. ]
no subject
the amount is staggering. higher than it had been when she first started working for heleen. hundreds of thousands of kruge . . . there is no way in any reality that inej could ever begin to hope paying it back. and the tiny flicker of rage that had been building over the last handful of days almost rears its ugly head, but it's quickly overridden by crushing relief. ]
So --
[ saints, she feels as if she has jumped into the ocean and promptly forgotten how to swim. ]
So I am -- I'm free?
[ almost dumbfounded, as she looks up at kaz again, startled. ]
I owe her nothing -- I owe you nothing?
no subject
[ He gives her a faint smile, another try at being reassuring, though he has no idea if it's coming across. The shock is still settling in, it seems like. Similar to when he'd gotten the ruling in court, Tomassen standing next to him with a hand on one shoulder, steadying. That day feels like a fever dream, sometimes. ]
There is a catch. [ Kaz puts his phone away, thinking over his words. ] I'm filing a suit against her operations. Right now there's enough evidence to get her heavily fined or jailed—but that depends on whether you'll want to stand in the trial. I can dig deeper if you're on board.
[ Since she likely isn't the only person who's suffered from Heleen's awfulness. ]
no subject
finally, though, the rest of what he says sinks in. an opportunity to bring down heleen? a miracle, truthfully. and kaz still hasn't answered the question of why -- why he would help her, why would he fight to shut down heleen . . . but the why is irrelevant, really, if kaz isn't interested in being paid back.
or, well. he is . . . in the form of inej helping with this case. which will not be easy. heleen will likely target her, to get her to shut her mouth. and inej really has no idea whether kaz can actually keep her safe, or protect her from much of anything.
not that she needs it, truthfully. she has taken care of herself so far. she can continue to do so. and being careful is a small price to pay for shutting heleen down for good. ]
She bought me when I was thirteen years old.
[ after a moment, setting her jaw when she looks up at him, a steeled expression flickering to life in her eyes. ]
I'll do whatever it takes to bring her to hell.
no subject
[ He echoes it softly, in disbelief. Not that he imagines she's lying, but just the sheer horror of what happened is a struggle to come to to terms with. No one should have to go through what she has and especially not so young. Kaz thought he'd been jaded enough to expect the worst but somehow this makes his stomach turn.
Maybe, he thinks, it's the idea of the touching. Disgusting.
Shaking his head, he focuses back on the fierce expression on her face. It won't be easy, this case, but she knows that. Knows how truly awful Heleen Van Houden is. She won't hesitate, he thinks, despite the potential danger. ]
There's more research to do. I passed along records I dug up to my lawyer's office this morning. He's fairly sure we'll be able to pin her, though he asked for a copy of your contract.
no subject
what happened to her has been a game of survival for so long that she sometimes forgets how horrifying it is. it's just been . . . normal. surviving, and doing what it takes to survive, and living in this place.
the realization that she doesn't have to deal with that anymore is still sinking in. she doesn't need to go to the menagerie again. she can have the tattoo on her arm removed. she can sleep until noon and do whatever she pleases with her time, her money.
the scars remain, but healing can begin, now. it doesn't change how horrible the beginning was, though.
her steeled expression softens slightly before she reaches out to touch his arm gently, fingertips brushing along his sleeve. ]
What do you want for dinner?
no subject
She looks about as stunned as he felt when he'd woken up the day after the verdict. Not quite sure that this was reality but not wanting it to be anything else. There's another layer to the ordeal for her– no longer will she have to go back to the Menagerie to be at the mercy of the hands of rich and disgusting men. She won't have to work two jobs just to try and pay her rent. Every dream she'd wanted and had to put aside were now back as a possibility.
Kaz wouldn't consider him a nice person, but this feels worth it. His gaze tracks from her face to the light touch on his arm, though he doesn't pull away. ]
Shouldn't I be asking you that? First evening of freedom and all.
no subject
she can't really remember the last time she laughed. ]
I want to buy you dinner, on my first night of freedom.
[ warmly, as she crosses her arms over her chest, amused. ]
No takebacks. And you have to pick what you want. And you can't purposefully select the cheapest thing on the menu.
[ she doesn't know kaz brekker very well, but she can anticipate that he's exceptionally stubborn, and has refused her money for every meal she's attempted to buy since staying on his couch. what a gentleman. ]
no subject
Which is compounded by the delight in the sound of her laugh, full and warm. He can't help the flicker of a smile that curls the corner of his mouth. ]
Bossy, aren't we? [ He isn't bothered. She is, after all, relishing in the chance to flex this particular freedom of choice. ] There's a Zemeni place around the corner called Zoma. The spicy beef stew.
no subject
[ spicy beef stew, got it. and she moves to the couch again to pick up her phone to order. as she pulls up the app, she scans the menu herself to pick out what she wants . . . and to also ensure Kaz’s selection is not the cheapest option.
( it isn’t. but this place is also not very expensive in general. )
she pops in the order as she wanders toward lizabeta’s cage, and she lets the little bird hop onto her hand and up her arm before she turns to Kaz with a grin. ]
Ordered.
[ and she meanders back toward kaz, lizabeta eventually settling against her neck, peeping in contentment. Inej soon returns to her seat on the couch, tilting her head back to look at Kaz. ]
This had better not be a dream.
[ she says as lizabeta preens her feathers. ]
I feel like I am going to wake up to reality any minute now.
no subject
His food tolerance has greatly improved since then.
As Inej orders, he goes into the kitchen to heat up water for tea, feeling like the chill from outside is lingering. His apartment is fairly well insulated but it's cold enough outside to make the living room feel breezy.
He limps back over when she settles down with Lizabeta, taking a seat in the armchair he favors. Well, it's not like he dislikes the couch. But it feels like it would be too close with the two of them. ]
Think you're safe, most dreams aren't so logical. [ He leans back in his seat, stretching his bad leg out with a sigh. ] If a group of sharks started swimming by, though, that's a good indicator it's time to wake up.
no subject
she sits quietly for a few minutes, letting lizabeta walk her way along her shoulders and ducking underneath her hair before the little bird walks back down her arm to settle on her fingers, stretching her wings.
but as the silence stretches on (still comfortable, inej not feeling the pressure to speak), the thought pops into her head again: ]
Why do you want to help me?
[ she asks, her eyes flickering toward kaz, her brow furrowing slightly. testing the waters, a bit. ]
Heleen is going to come for you, too, the minute she finds out this is more than paying off a debt.
no subject
So he settles for saying just enough:
Fine. And no, she isn't. It's complicated.
Frankly, that's not too far off. ]
She can try. [ He sends his text and looks up to meet her glance, steady and confident. ] I dealt with Pekka Rollins for almost a decade; bad contract, in and out of courts.
[ If he can stop someone from having to do the same thing, that's worth it. ]
no subject
You can't be much older than I am.
[ after a moment, as she gently runs her fingers along lizabeta's feathers, letting the bird nibble at the sleeve of her shirt. ]
He got you young, too?
no subject
Twenty, this year. [ So strange to acknowledge. He remembers being fifteen and feeling like he would never make it this far, not under the weight of the case and simply trying to survive. ]
I was nine. [ Jordie had recently turned twelve and neither of them had any sense. That part still aches, always wishing his brother could've seen it all work out. ]
no subject
I am eighteen.
[ easily enough; seems fair, to tell him after he told her, after all. she lets lizabeta flutter up onto her head, the little bird poking through her hair with her beak. ]
When is your birthday? [ curiously; mostly to make a mental note. he had said this year . . . so it must not have passed yet. maybe? she can ask jesper. ]
no subject
He wonders what she'll do now. After she celebrates, of course.
Lizabeta flutters the short distance from Inej's shoulder to the top of her head, small beak arranging her hair. It's an amusing picture, one he can't help a slight smile for. ]
January twelfth. [ Recently passed. He'd gone over to Jesper's place and been fussed at by his boyfriend, Wylan. ]
When's yours, then?
[ If it hasn't gone by already, maybe she'll soon be having a first birthday free of Heleen. ]
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[ she hasn't thought about her own birthday in a long time. mostly because it's painful. inej is an only child, and her parents used to make a very big deal out of her birthday. which feels like . . . eons ago. any attempt she's made to contact them or try to track them down has either been thwarted by heleen or failed miserably.
she idly wonders where they are, now. or if they miss her. or even know if she's alive. but she quickly shoves that down to shrug a little. ]
Sorry that I missed your extravagant party.
[ a light-hearted joke, because while inej doesn't know kaz very well, she can tell he would rather do literally anything else on his birthday than attend an extravagant party. ]
Maybe I can come to the next one.
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Too bad, it was the talk of the town. Chocolate fountains, champagne, the works.
[ Ugh. He would never. It's an egregious amount of money for no reason. Sure he can be glad he's made it another year but that's less about celebrating a birth and more about the survival aspect. Inej seems to understand he doesn't care for the extravagance, at least. ]
Maybe so. [ He takes a seat in the chair nearby, stretching his legs out, the toe of one shoe close to her feet. Technically, it's easier to stretch out on the other side of the couch, where he wouldn't be almost touching her, but that would also put him closer, generally. It's easier to talk to her this way anyway. ]
It's early to ask— what will you do now?
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lizabeta makes herself comfortable on top of inej's head, and inej considers his question, settling back into the corner of the couch. ]
I don't know.
[ it's an honest answer, crossing her legs at her ankles. there's a million things to consider, and things to do. to sort through. to process. heal. her first thought is to go to ravka, to find her parents, but . . . how would she even do that?
she has to finish her business here, first. ]
I don't really have anywhere to go. [ admittedly, with a shrug of her shoulders, as lizabeta hops back down, fluttering to land on inej's lap. ] So I have to figure that out, first.
[ she pauses, though, her eyes flickering to his leg before her gaze meets his, inclining her head toward the couch. ]
You would probably be more comfortable if you laid down on the couch.
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Now she has so much choice it's likely to be overwhelming. Especially as she still processes the whole situation.
Though, she does start with the practical end: where she'll stay. ]
If you want to stay here in the meantime. [ Kaz gives her a half-shrug from where he's practically slouched down in his seat. ]
Technically, it's not long enough.
[ There's a way to make it work. But really, he doesn't want to kick her off the couch out of a probably stupid sense of pride. ]
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I think I have been enough of a burden; I don't want to continue being in your way.
[ and inej unfolds her legs to get up under the guise of stretching . . . before she moves to sit in the chair opposite him, arching her eyebrows in his direction. ]
And I also think the couch looks long enough.
[ move it, loser. ]
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