timewasting | OPEN POST 2020.

[ kaz brekker was a fucking idiot.

she had been back in ketterdam after months of being away, and she had arrived at a bad time. the gang violence in the barrel had come to a head, and inej truly arrived in the midst of mayhem. she had no problems crossing ketterdam to slip into kaz's office, but had been greeted with something of a predicament.

she had expected a hug, an excited grin, or an ask on how the seas were, but none of those things happened, because kaz was on his way to deal with a threat. something he apparently had to do personally. and when inej had volunteered her services (because of course she would), she had been refused.

then, they had gotten into an argument. it was a pointless argument, one that was was full of vitriol for the sake of being vitriolic. he didn't want her to go because she didn't need to go, and inej pointed out that no one had to know she was going because no one would be able to see her, and it had ended with inej telling him fine, do what you feel is best, and slipping right back out the window, vanishing from sight into the dark skies of ketterdam.

she then, naturally, flipped herself up easily onto the roof, and waited. to follow kaz wherever he was going, picking her way along the rooftops silently, to make sure the moron didn't get himself killed.

she did not spend four months at sea to return to a dead kaz brekker because he was too stubborn to accept help out of some maligned attempt to protect her. ]

[ Inej comes back at one of the worst possible times. He had a feeling she would be docking in Ketterdam soon, but had been hoping it was after he dealt with the mess the Dregs and Black Tips were currently embroiled in. Half of the grievances he thinks are frivolous things made up on the spot to fluff up the rest. And he's been involved in this situation long enough he's nearly forgotten what started it all.

Some territory encroachment, probably. A Black Tip getting too fresh, also possible.

Either way, negotiation—in the Barrel way—has fallen through and it's gotten to the point where something physical will have to happen. Ever since taking over the Dregs, he hasn't had as many reasons to go out and do something himself, his reputation keeping most well enough away. So maybe there's a vicious part of him looking forward to getting his hands dirty. It would allow him to vent his personal frustration in a way that wasn't occasionally screaming into his pillow.

The only downside to all of this, aside from knowing he'll have plenty of Dregs to patch up in the aftermath, is not only Inej showing up at the wrong time but deciding she was going to get involved. All of the qualities he likes about her—determination, self sufficiency, pride—become extremely vexing because she won't take no for an answer. She didn't need to be there for the fight, that was a pointless venture.

So naturally, with two headstrong people, they have a row over it.

Her parting words are as far from a concession as possible and he doesn't feel any better as he stalks downstairs to the awaiting Dregs. Anika tilts her head in his direction and he ignores the concern, fuming and ready to have this be over with. ]

Let's go.

[ As they head out, he doesn't need to look to know Inej is following on her own path. He isn't sure where she is exactly, aside from slipping across a rooftop. It annoys him the entire way, expression dark and thunderous by the time they come across the Black Tips. Maybe there's a slight satisfaction in seeing some of their number unable to meet his eye.

It isn't enough of them, though, because soon the tension snaps and the fight starts, everyone in a flurry of motion. The only thing he thinks is: stay out of this, Ghafa. But she probably won't. ]

[ though she was no longer a dreg in the sense of the word (her contract was paid, and she was free to do whatever she wanted), she was a dreg in the sense of loyalty to kaz, and to the friends she had made along the way. so if kaz needed something of her, she would be there. no questions asked.

but then, kaz refused her. and so, inej followed.

she knew he would know she was there, and she knew she would probably cause another fight later once he caught up with her, but no one caught the wraith on the rooftops of ketterdam. and navigating her way to the fight is easy enough, where she rests on her heels, perched along a gutter as she watches the fight begin.

at first, inej doesn't move to interfere. for as much as kaz brekker infuriates her, she trusts him. and if he doesn't believe he needs her, then he likely doesn't. but as inej surveys the battlefield, she sees the glint of metal down a darkened alley. people who are not involved in the chaos. and as inej narrows her eyes, she sees that there is a separate group of people making their way to the fight.

people who aren't in black tips colors or flag.

mercenaries? inej wonders to herself, but she quickly moves along the rooftops. kaz would have said if he had a contingency plan (or, well, maybe he wouldn't), but as inej gets closer, she overhears whispers. plans to attack the dregs.

and so, the wraith strikes.

at first, it probably isn't very noticeable to kaz, until some poor terrified bastard stumbles out of an alley bleeding from the side, rambling to anyone who will listen that the wraith is here. he's quickly followed by an unconscious man who lands with an unpleasant thud, and his unloaded gun thrown him.

but no sign of inej. not quite yet, as she scales back up to the rooftops to get rid of the rest of them. ]

[ Like every fight in the Barrel, it's a chaotic and ruthless mess from the word go. Honestly, he isn't sure who takes the first swing, just knows that someone does and the rest follow like tipped dominos, like a stack of card chips scattered to the floor.

Then it's no longer about seeing three steps ahead or outsmarting the people around him. It's about survival, pure and simple. There aren't any rules in these fights except one: someone wins and the other loses. Pure and simple.

At first he tries to keep an eye on the outskirts, just to make sure they aren't flanked. To be sure reinforcements aren't on their way. But soon enough, he's trapped in the midst of it all, the only thing creating distance being the swing of his cane and the satisfying but grim crunch of bone that happens when it connects. Eventually, he fights his way through a line of Black Tips, coming out near the mouth of an alley and littered in bruises. There's a slice along the side of his coat but it had only split the seam and not the layers beneath.

What greets him at the alley is an unconscious figure, bigger than any of the men he'd seen in the Black Tips' ranks. His gun has skittered from his death-loosened fingertips. Kaz immediately looks up, scanning the silhouette of the roof for a familiar motion.

But as always, Inej is a wraith and right now, she doesn't want to be seen by him.

Annoyed, he scoops up the pistol and gets back into the fray, the silvery crow skull on top of his cane flashing once he brings it down on the back of the gang member with his arms wrapped around Anika's middle. Inej shouldn't be here and yet she is. And she's obviously taken out some ne'er do wells on the fringes. Mercenaries?

It gives him a sense of chagrin, to know she'll be able to say I told you so. ]

[ she keeps to the shadows, striking only when necessary to avoid being caught. another mercenary drops in a separate alleyway, and inej quickly edges along the wall, peering around the corner to keep tabs on where kaz is, in the mayhem. and once she catches sight of him, she exhales a soft breath.

good. he's safe.

but it's in the moment of reprieve, the relaxation of her senses for two seconds, that someone grabs her by the hood, and inej immediately whips around with a knife sinking between the ribs of the black tip that attempted to silence her. it's a quick hit, but noticeable -- and her cover is blown, now, and two more make their way toward her.

inej, not having enough time to scale the roof, flips her knife in her hand once before readying herself for the fight, hissing underneath her breath: ]

I am going to kill him.

[ this was supposed to be a pleasant evening spent inside with her significant other, not a street brawl. ]

[ Now that he knows she's in the area, the sudden appearance of more bodies around the edges of the fight make complete sense. The fact that there are more people is still concerning and he's not sure what to make of it. Unfortunately, the middle of a brawl is not exactly the best place to think it through, to turn over all the angles.

Since right now, the only thing that comes to mind is that he really pissed some people off. Which he knew already, it didn't take a genius to see that.

Someone gets a grip on the back of his coat and he quickly shrugs out of it, fist connecting with the man's throat. There's a gurgling wheeze that tells him he won't be much use in the next few seconds and he moves on, leaving his coat where's now been dropped on the ground.

As with most things that ignite quickly, the fight burns itself out, leaving the Dregs clearly triumphant. The remaining Black Tips turn tail and run off to lick their wounds. They'll be back eventually, he knows their leader too well– and it seems the man survived. How unfortunate. He sets Pim to take stock, doling out quick direction on where to bring the wounded. Their dead will need to be taken care of, something Anika is already starting to gather hands for.

Limping over to one of the mercenary bodies, he starts searching it, looking for any sign of who hired them. To the air, he says: ]

You can come out. [ May as well get this over with. ]

[ inej has escaped mostly unharmed, though someone was stupid enough to punch her in the stomach. they were quickly displaced with a knee to the gut and a knife to the side. but as inej spins to cut down the next one, there’s a sudden retreat... and inej retreats to the shadows, to account for her wounds, and take stock of the scene.

once Kaz says that, however, any chance of a pleasant reunion sort of goes out the window. ]

What was it you said, that you did not need me?

[ says a voice from nothing, and inej lands on her feet nearly, yanking back her hood, clearly annoyed. she has some wounds, but nothing very serious. more annoyances than anything. and she moves closer, gesturing toward the man that is easily twice her size, dead on the ground. ]

He wanted your head on a stake, and would have had it, if I listened to your foolish arrogance.

[ YOU ALSO RUINED HER EVENING but she’ll save that for later ]

[ Having been in the middle of everything, he looks much worse for wear. Everything near his middle aches, as does his shoulder where someone had seen fit to slam into him from the side. His leg is complaining fiercely but that's a pain he's so used to that he's become expert at ignoring it. There's a rapidly forming bruise high on his cheek and a few nicks where knives made it close enough to draw thin lines of blood.

Papercuts, really. They sting all the same.

The lighting in the alley isn't much to speak of but he rakes his eyes over her anyway as she drops down, scrutinizing. Looking for any sign of discomfort.

All he gets is annoyance, which means she's completely intact. ]

I would've handled it. Most of Ketterdam wants my head on a pike, that's not news.

[ she has some bruised ribs, a few cuts, but far better than kaz. and her annoyance is tempered slightly at the sight of his face, but then

kaz keeps talking. ]

You are unbelievable.

[ with no small amount of frustration, one arm looping around her middle, jaw set. ]

You would have been outnumbered and outflanked had I listened to your ridiculous ego.

[ but Inej exhales abruptly, the breath hissing through her teeth. it was wasted effort, and she was tired, and sore, and her ribs hurt. ]

I am going to sleep; enjoy your victory.

[ two can play the “storm off because I’m immature” game, although Inej doesn’t storm off just yet. she adjusts her jacket to identify a tear in it, irritated.

she should have just stayed on the ship. ]

[ How is he the unbelievable one? This is what he deals with when she's gone, she should know that. She has to know that. After all, it's hardly a departure from what he'd done before she left. Sometimes the Barrel demanded a brawl and that's what it got, blood running in the streets and a silent payment made to the darker side of Ghezen.

Greed came in more forms than simply money.

Exhaling in annoyance, he knows she's likely right about being outflanked. Those mercenaries had meant business; the gun he'd lifted earlier wasn't a rough stock, it was made of something nicer. His irritation dulls as she hisses out a breath—bruised ribs, maybe. Cracked, also possible. ]

I'm walking you back. [ To wherever she's intending to stay. He can't imagine she'll be so keen to remain at the Slat though, the two of them sharing a space like before. ] Or do you object to that as well?

[ she stares at him for a long moment, jaw set, clearly weighing out what she wants to say, and whether she wants to continue this argument here, or at the slat. and the longer she looks at him, the faster exhaustion begins to nip at her heels.

what is she even angry about? his refusal to accept help, for one, but more than that, the knowledge that she isn’t here to be his eyes — not always, not anymore. and while she knows kaz can take care of himself, what about the time when he can’t. where he missteps. where there isn’t a spider lurking in the dark.

maybe she is just tired, and taking it out on him.

— or maybe he’s just being an ass. both are possible, and likely true. ]

I object to your refusal to accept help, and I object to being treated like I cannot help you any longer. But I am not so foolish.

[ finally, and though she still sounds annoyed, it’s slightly less cold. ]

They came from the East. [ the hired help that inej has nearly dispatched. ] We should take the lit path, back home. They will avoid us.

[ it will be easier for inej to keep an eye out without worrying about kaz at the same time. ]

[ There's a tense silence after his question and though the lighting is poor, he gets the impression she's weighing what she wants to say. And is supremely aggravated. In better light, he could see the flex of her jaw, he's sure.

But she doesn't just leave him where he stands, which he'd been sure she would do. ]

Fine.

[ Why is he so cross about this? Perhaps it's just her irritation at his decisions. She's not beholden to him any longer and she's only just gotten back—he just wanted some assurance she was somewhere safe, after being away for four months.

He starts walking then, taking the direction she'd mentioned. Part of him wants to take another route out of spite, but his leg feels it's on fire and the lit path would be one of the shortest. ]

You're not here often. [ Kaz starts, the words a bit stiff, as though he hasn't figured out how he wants to say them. As if it'll explain why he'd been wanting to keep her out of the fight. ]

[ she falls into step with him easily, an arm still looped around her middle. her eyes scan the rooftops briefly, to make sure they aren't being followed . . . but then, anyone who attacks kaz brekker and inej ghafa when they're both in vile moods is likely asking for a death wish to be granted.

but being angry doesn't suit inej, and she soon feels the anger start to bleed out as they walk in silence. she can feel that kaz is still angry and frustrated, but she doesn't comment or speak. instead, she waits for him to speak first . . . and eventually, he does. ]

That is why I am frustrated.

[ it's said evenly, her eyes still roving the rooftops, not looking at him as they walk.

kaz surrounds himself with the best people available, but it had weighed on her mind before she left ketterdam, that kaz would no longer have her. and while inej is humble, she knows that there is no one in ketterdam that can compare to her, in terms of stealth, in terms of collecting information, in terms of watching his back.

it's in thinking this through that she realizes she's being frustrated over something silly, and she exhales slowly, allowing the pressure in her chest to release. ]

One day, you are going to have to start trusting that I can both take care of myself and that I can choose what I want to do with what I have been gifted.

[ in terms of her skill, her freedom. ]

[ Unlike Inej, he's used to the burn of anger. Years of knowing Rollins was out there, living freely without a drop of guilt had haunted him. Motivated him.

This isn't the same kind of fury, but he's familiar with it all the same. Because it's now the shape of words behind his teeth that he can't force out, the chaotic mix of emotion he's having a hard time putting a name to. ]

And what happens to the Wraith if you're killed in a gang spat? What then? [ She worked hard for that dream. The last thing he wants is it to end prematurely.

Or more accurately: the last thing he wants is for her to die because she got caught in the middle. His decisions had already seen her stolen by Van Eck, with her legs nearly shattered. Had gotten her stabbed by Oomen for even being associated with him.

She has the ability to bow out now but she won't take it. ]

That is not your decision to make.

[ and finally, she stops walking, grabbing his wrist to bring him to a stop next to her, jaw set. ]

I wanted to go because I wanted to go. Because I wanted to help my friends, and help you. And whatever consequences arise from that decision are mine, and no one else's.

[ and she uncurls her fingers from his wrist, returning to wrapping both her arms around her middle, eyes dark with frustration. ]

My loyalties did not change simply because I am now free.

[ The grip on his wrist does stop him in his tracks and he turns to look at her. A nearby street lamp illuminates her face, putting her frustration in sharp relief.

He opens his mouth to argue, at first, and then closes it, turning his head away with an annoyed exhale. She's right, as usual. Except it chafes to hear so plainly. Still, he swallows the angry words and unclenches his jaw, bringing his gaze back to hers. ]

It's not your loyalty I'm worried about.

Then you should not be surprised.

[ finally, though, the anger seems to have been released, bleeding slowly from her system as she exhales slowly — and finally, inej just looks tired. she has never been able to remain angry with Kaz in particular, not for very long.

and she purses her lips together, weighing out if she wants to continue before she decides to hell with it. ]

We are supposed to be watching each other’s backs, but you will not allow me to watch yours.

[ Surprised is not exactly the word he would've used. Because as much as he dislikes her decision to follow him, it's not like it/ uncharacteristic of her. Even in the Dregs; when she had something in mind, she was going to do it regardless of his planning. Occasionally, he'd depended on that, calculating her obstinance into a scheme.

Most of the time, though, she did as she wanted. Which was usually the smart move. ]

I didn't want this to be the thing that greeted you back. [ Especially not after a long journey. ]

You cannot control the way the wind blows, Kaz.

[ the barrel will explode when it wants to explode, and inej could arrive in peace, and she could arrive in war. but she would rather be on his side in both instances, than waiting somewhere without him.

she watches him for a long moment before she sighs, unlooping one arm from around her middle to catch his free hand, squeezing it gently before tugging him along, to continue walking toward the slat. ]

We should go to sleep; you will likely be needed in the morning.

[ That he knows and it still rankles in some ways. Especially in this instance, where he just wants to keep Inej safe, to guarantee she'll outlive him somehow, even though their work is dangerous.

Briefly, he entertains the thought of doing something else. Building it all up and burning it to the ground, like he told her at the end of the Van Eck job. But no, he can't do that now, he's embroiled in it all and wouldn't have it any other way. ]

There's a healer probably at the Slat, do you want them to take a look at those ribs?

[ Honestly, sleep sounds really good right now, in light of everything that happened. And maybe with the anger fading, he's simply glad to have her here, his fingers giving hers a little squeeze as they start walking again. ]

[ there's a huff of frustration at the comment about her ribs, and inej intertwines their fingers as they walk. she is desperately glad to be back, and relieved everything went well. and now that the anger has faded, inej really just wants to hug him tightly and then go to sleep. ]

I will be fine. [ the moron who punched her was wearing brass knuckles, which was annoying, mostly because she should have moved out of the way, but she had had another one on her heels, and needed to dispatch them quickly. ] It is just a bruise; I will wrap them before I go to sleep.

[ nothing a good night sleep won't fix. but as they walk . . . ]

You should see them; you look like you took a few hard hits.

[ he won't, but. you know. an attempt has to be made. ]

[ The question: do you want help Is at the top of his tongue and he struggles over whether or not it's too much. Whether that's a boundary being crossed. In the hotel, he helped with her shoulder, but this is different. They're both different. Better in some ways, he thinks, as he wishes he'd taken his gloves off to hold her hand. ]

It looks worse than it is, my coat suffered the most. [ And it was left somewhere in that fray, probably unsalvageable. Everything else was cuts and bruises, things to clean off before getting into bed. ]

Do you— [ Um. Well, he started it, may as we'll finish. ] —will you want any help?

[ ah, right. his coat. that was what was missing. better than his gloves and (saints forbid) his ostentatious cane. but inej makes a mental note to herself to see if she can retrieve it in the early morning, before law enforcement arrives to scour the scene . . . if they care enough to do so, anyway.

at his question, though, inej opens her mouth to respond with an easy I can do it myself, but she stops before the words escape. recalculating her response in her head.

truthfully, she doesn't really need the help. she's done it herself multiple times, and she would likely continue to do it herself for the foreseeable future. but he had offered, which meant two things: (1) he legitimately wants to help and (2) he might actually feel bad for being an ass.

the odds of number (2) being true remain to be seen, but the first was probably a certainty.

so: ]

It would be easier if I had help. [ an acquiescence; the truth, but allowing him an out if he didn't want to bother. but to clear the awkwardness from the air, inej gently bumps her shoulder into his, her tone shifting from quiet to a little more dry: ] Does this mean you are no longer angry with me?

[ one day she'll get an actual apology out of kaz brekker. it probably won't be over this, because inej probably should have stayed home. but she can dream. ]

[ The question is out there and as much as some part of him wants to take it back, he won't. It's progress, right?

Still, he's a bit surprised when she agrees to let him. He feels the first creep of anxiety, mentally preparing to be so close and touch so much. Her nudge against his side soothes some of it, because he thinks about hugging her instead. How nice it had been to do so. ]

The odds are in your favor. [ Staying angry with Inej is a useless exercise. And maybe he does feel a little bad for taking his worry out on her.

As they get to the Slat, he opens the door and holds it for her, doing a quick scan of the downstairs. It's relatively quiet, as it sometimes is after a big fight, the adrenaline worn off into worry for the injured. Anika nods to him from the open doorway of one of the bigger rooms, clearly overseeing something. Later, he'll take stock of the situation. There's no point in doing it now. ]

[ there's a slight roll of her eyes at his response, but as she ducks into the slat, the feelings of annoyance finally melt away completely. it's unusually quiet, and her lips purse together into a faint frown at the lack of noise, and -- presumably -- the injured people in the wings.

it's far from her first gang conflict, and it likely won't be the last, even if inej stayed away from the slat for the rest of her days. but every time it happens, her heart is heavy -- for the people lost, and the people injured. the thought of how it could have been her, or kaz, or jesper . . .

she gets through the people who are there relatively easily, a slight wave of a hand in greeting to some dregs she recognizes, before she heads for the stairs. she doesn't look to see if kaz is following her, because she assumes he'll head up there anyway.

once she does get up there, she waits for kaz, resting against the desk in the corner, exhaling slowly to release some of the pressure in her chest . . . but once he does meander into the room, inej makes it about two seconds before she crosses the room and (with a beat of hesitation), slowly loops her arms around his middle for a hug, resting her forehead against his chest with a breath.

she is glad he is okay.

even if he is the worst. ]

( kaz. )

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