timewasting | open post 2k4.

I don't need a tour right now.

[ she says easily, tearing her view from the window only when the last rays of sunlight disappear behind the hills. the light squeeze around her middle does not go unnoticed, and inej turns a bit to slide her own arms around his middle, encapsulating him in a warm hug with a smile. ]

We should both clean up and sit by the fire. [ she decides; not a heavy lift, for kaz, and no requirement for him to talk about more than whatever he wishes to talk about. after all, they were skating along on ice thin enough to break. there was no need to push him when being here was already opening a wound. she tugs his shirt a bit straighter, smile softening. ] Let me take care of you, hm? You need comfortable clothes and a good rest; the ride was long.

[ and while it wasn't the most uncomfortable carriage in the world, it was still a carriage. they were both bound to be stiff. ]

[ She's giving him an out, something he would occasionally bristle at. But, in the moment, he's just relieved. That spreads even further as she turns to hug him more fully, her warmth felt more keenly due to the chill in the house. ]

It is warmer than in here. [ For now. Tomorrow morning he'll ensure the fires are going in their respective hearths, as they move through the rooms in the day. As always, Inej has a point, too–washing up and simply resting sounded like a good idea. His leg isn't screaming in pain but, it is distinctly uncomfortable after being stuck in a carriage for a prolonged period. Being able to stretch it out at his leisure is certainly appealing.

So, he relents at her suggestions without an argument, already feeling too emotionally worn to light a match to their fuses. Tired and moderately agreeable, he catches the hand she uses to adjust his shirt, brushing a light kiss to her fingers. ]

Upstairs, then. [ He'll grab one of their bags on the way up, confident in his memory enough to navigate the initial darkness of the stairwell in order to light the couple of lamps as he ascends. On his way down the hall, he pauses in front of the doorway he'd shared with Jordie. The door's open, presumably to feel more homey; the drapes have been replaced with delicate lace, the twin beds not quite the same as he remembers. With a deep breath, he shuts the door quietly, unwilling to go there just yet.

The master bedroom is at the end of the hall and with a fresh log in the fireplace, it becomes cozy quite quickly, allowing them both to wash and change without shivers. His leg feels better after the heat of the water and being in less starched, stiff clothing. He's taken a seat in the armchair by one set of windows while he listens to Inej complete her nightly rituals, letting the present sink in. ]

[ she gets ready for bed rather quickly, but slows her routine near the end to give kaz time to decompress on his own. his brief hesitation outside of a room with two twin beds in it did not escape her notice; she assumes it must have been the room he shared with jordie. deciding he was not ready to tackle that particular hurdle, he had shut the door, and inej had said nothing. instead, she had simply followed him toward the master bedroom, allowing him to get ready first.

once she's finished brushing out her hair and washing her face, though, inej decides kaz has had enough time to sort through his thoughts. and so she slips back into the room, wearing a large shirt for bed. it was plenty warm now, between the fire and what appeared to be a comfortable bed with a thick comforter. so she takes stock of the room for a moment before deciding to make her way to the armchair, easily climbing into kaz's lap, straddling his hips with a warm smile.

she takes his face into her hands, giving him a soft kiss before murmuring: ]

Hi.

[ there was no real intent, in the motion. just warm affection for the sake of it. ]

[ As usual, he catches a flutter of movement out of the corner of his eye when Inej comes out of the adjoined bathroom. He's only moderately aware her legs are bare, her nightgown consisting of a long shirt instead of a shift or something similar. When he finally tears his gaze away from the flickering shadows out the window, he's greeted with a lap full of Inej.

His breath hitches as she settles her weight across his hips and thighs, the rush of warmth overtaking anything else he'd been ruminating on. Smiling, he slowly runs his palms up her thighs, over the soft cotton of her shirt, settling on her hips. ]

Hello, Inej. [ He greets her back, leaning in to press a kiss to her mouth and then her cheek, happy to have her here. ] I trust the water was boiling enough for you?

[ Even if she hadn't taken one of her proper baths tonight. He doesn't know how she stands the water so hot, almost enough to cook a lobster in. ]

Mmm, satisfactory.

[ he looks good like this, relaxed and smiling underneath her. her hands shift to push the hair out of his eyes, grinning a little at how it falls askew. she kisses him again, the touch gentle, and she presses her forehead against his briefly before settling back on her knees, hands falling to his chest. ]

And you? [ a hand rests over his heart, fingers idly playing with a loose wrinkle in his shirt. he looks less... well, harried. lost in bad memories. more in the present, like this, which is good. not haunted by whatever happened here, so long ago. ] You look appropriately comfortable.

Only satisfactory? Good thing I took some precautionary measures to keep your toes warm.

[ She'll find a surprise under the comforter on her side; an old heating pan so the sheets and blankets would already be warmed by the time she crawled under them.

When she settles back more on his thighs, he traces his hands up her sides and then along her arms, covering both of her hands with his, slowly running his thumbs across her knuckles. It gives him something to focus on, as he considers her question. Right now, he definitely doesn't feel as pinched as nervy as he had earlier, when they first arrived. Despite the bad memory of him leaving this house, all those years ago, there's plenty of good ones he's started to remember. Not to mention: she's here. Her presence helps, he thinks, to chase away whatever past wants to hold on. Because Inej is so firmly someone who'd never been here. That made it easier to focus on the present. ]

You're here. [ As though that completely answers the unspoken questions under her words. ] It's difficult to be uncomfortable when you're sitting in my lap wearing—what I suspect is—one of my old shirts.

[ indeed, he seems firmly in the present, focusing on her. even better, kaz doesn't seem to be ignoring what was bothering him in lieu of something else. no, he seems well and truly relaxed, which is a rarity. like something has finally fallen into place, letting whatever was lurking in the dark finally be laid to rest.

his demons will come back, she is sure. they've only just gotten here. there was a lot of healing to do. but for the moment, he is exactly who she has always known him to be, and that is more than enough. ]

You were not using it. [ in a matter-of-fact tone, though judging from the slight upward curve of her lips, kaz is, indeed, correct. she knows he likes it, when she wears his clothes. assisting in ensuring his first night here is comfortable and pleasant, anyway. ] So I requisitioned it for my own purposes.

[ read: she stole it. though she does glance toward the bed, curious at what exactly he prepared. the fire is nice and warm, and kaz is always warm. there was only one way to find out, but that would require moving. which, at the moment, was non-negotiable. ]

Are you ready for bed? [ it's a genuine question, letting him take her hands in his own, fingers loose as he strokes her knuckles. ] Or do you want to stay up a bit more?

[ At her explanation that he was no longer using it and therefore it was free for her to requisition, he laughs quietly. This is an old habit between the two of them; she's been filching his clothes ever since she started crossing the True Sea. If he could reliably take hers and have them fit, he'd be doing much the same in an attempt to keep her scent with him longer when she left Ketterdam. ]

Not enough petty theft out on the ocean to keep your skills sharp?

[ Certainly, she takes valuables from the slaver ships she sinks. It's a distinctly different process than lifting the wallet from a pigeon in the Barrel, though. ]

I could lie down, if you'd rather. [ Physically, he's ready for something more restful. Kaz knows his mind won't shut off for at least another couple hours, though, even if he feels perfectly content at the moment. There's too much to think about, while here. Most of it not on purpose.

But, he supposes he can at least make an attempt to rest. Inej is here, and he always sleeps better when he's curled up with her. Which does sound enormously enticing at current. Her weight in his lap feels good; it's just not quite enough. ]

Not nearly enough to scratch the itch, I am afraid.

[ she says as she slides her hands back up his chest to the sides of his neck, considering him for a moment. part of her wants to remain in this chair and kiss him, to lavish him with as much affection and attention as he could bear. but the other part of her wants to do the same in bed, wrapped up and wholly separate from the world, within the warm confines of their comforter and sheets.

she kisses him again, allowing her eyes to close as she relaxes into him completely. drinking her fill of him with a soft sigh against his mouth. it's only after she pulls away that she decides: ]

Mmm. [ as she presses another kiss to the corner of his mouth, feeling warm and affectionate. and perhaps a little possessive, of how pliable and relaxed he is underneath her touch. ] You will be more comfortable in a bed.

[ and so, reluctantly, she untangles herself from him enough to stand, taking his hands within her own to pull him up to his feet. ]

Come along, then.

[ so she can continue her lazy ministrations nestled within their sheets. ]

A sign I've corrupted you?

[ Kaz grins, the expression following him into the kiss she starts, dimming down into a smile as she sighs into it. One hand has settled on the small of her back, palm lightly tracing the barest indentations of her spine. The other is skimming up her bare calf, stopping right at the edge of where the shirt hem rides up her thighs.

She brings up a good point though: it will be more comfortable on the bed. That doesn't mean they have to totally stop what they were doing. Just have to pause it. Temporarily.

Gratefully, he allows her to help pull him up out of the chair, dropping another affectionate kiss to her fingers before he lets go. Tugging the corner of the comforter up, he pulls the warming pan out from under it, setting it on its stand near the fireplace. Double-checking his cane was within reach, he then joins her on the bed, sliding under the covers with a pleased sigh.

Of course, as soon as she's moderately cozy, he's turning to reach for her, dragging her closer so he can playfully kiss her neck. ]

Corrupted me, hardly.

[ inej has never once lost her moral compass, thank you very much. it was just a bit... crooked, now, that's all.

her eyes light up a bit as he removes the warming pan, beginning to see what he had set up while she was getting ready. so it is with no small amount of eagerness that she slides into bed, sighing in delight at the warmth enveloping her. she's just about to allow her eyes to slide shut to fully enjoy it when she feels an arm around her middle, and she laughs at being dragged toward his side of the bed, her laugh devolving into a chuckle at the feeling of his lips at her neck. ]

Well, maybe a little. [ she admits, turning to return his kiss with a grin, sliding her arms around his neck, comfortable. ] But no more than I've corrupted you.

[ for the better, she thinks. if positive corruption existed. ]

Thank you for the warm bed. [ she adds, settling into her pillow after another soft kiss, her smile reaching her eyes as she places a hand on his cheek, eyes bright. ] I've forgotten how cold it can get in Kerch, even with the flowers beginning to bloom.

I've embraced the corruption. [ He says, giving her a small squeeze around her middle and leaning in to steal another kiss. Inej has always been beautiful to him but, there's something particular about when he gets to see her like this; relaxed and smiling, her face flushed with warmth, her hair undone and framing her face. His heart feels like it contracts with affection as he looks at her, brushing a long lock of stray hair away from her face. ]

Well, you see, it was out of self-preservation. [ Kaz starts to tease, kissing the tip of her nose. ] Had to protect my shins from your freezing cold toes.

Rich, coming from the man with the coldest hands this side of the True Sea.

[ though it’s said in a laugh, nose wrinkling at the kiss. she adores this side of him that he often buries in ketterdam — softer, less presentable. it almost feels as if they’re in a bubble, something inej treasures. it’s a rare thing, when they can be completely unbothered and free of responsibility. they can be themselves, without reputation or title.

she tilts his head slightly, just enough for another lazy kiss, murmuring: ]

I love you, you know.

[ just in case he forgot, in the span of a few hours since she last said it. ]

The real reason I wore gloves for so long.

[ It's said echoing her own laugh, his hand dipping below the comforter to trace her side. Once his fingers are sufficiently warmed by the trapped heat, he curls them around her thigh, teasingly inching her shirt up. He dips his head, pressing another kiss to her mouth before shifting his weight to continue a line of them to her jaw and neck.

At her comment, he smiles against her pulse point, lifting his gaze to meet hers. ]

I know. [ Though he answers with as much affection as he can infuse in the words. ] I adore you.

[ Really, how did he manage to get so lucky? When he looks past everything they've endured, all the things they're still working on—he's simply grateful she decided there had been something in him worth saving. That she'd told him all those years ago the terms he'd have to live up to, even if that conversation had haunted his every waking hour, the pain of it acute like a knife through the ribs. ]

[ she tilts her head back with a laugh as he kisses her neck. if only, she wants to say, in regards to his gloves. he sometimes still wears them for the image, but never around her -- unless it was a spectacularly bad day, which has thankfully not happened in quite some time. a hand shifts to his hair, running her fingers through it with sheer affection as he smiles against her throat. ]

Mm, I know. [ that he adores her. he shows it, in his own way, every day. she tilts her head enough to press a kiss to his temple, comfortable with their current entanglement. her lips curve into a wider smile; she can feel his wandering hands, if only just. it's still all surface-level -- touching just to touch, which she's perfectly fine with. whether it progresses or not, inej is all but liquid underneath his touch, relaxing into the warm nest of blankets with a comfortable sigh. ] You must, to leave your precious Ketterdam.

[ it's a jest, really; she knows this place is (obviously) of great importance to kaz. but getting kaz to leave ketterdam (his city and his home, now) often requires quite a bit of convincing. not because he's loathe to leave, but . . . well, fine, he was a bit loathe to leave. you wouldn't know it, by how relaxed he was now. ]

[ Her chin tips back as she laughs and he feels that squeeze in his chest, the one that makes him light-headed. That's the laugh, the one that'd slipped under creases in his armor he hadn't known existed. The one that had reminded him that magic could be more than sleight of hand and misdirection. There are days he really wishes he could bottle it up, savor it in sips when she was gone away at sea too long.

For now, he basks in it, letting it wash over him like a warm spring rain.

Shifting, he moves his other hand to curve along the side of her neck, thumb lightly resting on her jawline. Her words are a gentle tease and he huffs a quiet laugh at his expense. In a different time, the jab would've been injurious, would've reminded him that Ketterdam had only served to cage her in. ]

You're more precious than anything the city could ever offer me, Inej. [ Because despite his anxiety, his disagreement, his reluctance–if she asked him to burn it all to the ground and follow her instead, he would. There are hundreds of reasons why he stays in Ketterdam; his responsibilities, the gang, his crows (both sets), all the undone schemes. None are so significant as his role in being an anchor there for Inej when she finally came to dry land. ]

Besides, Ketterdam's my mother. All children have to fly the nest on occasion.

[ her smile softens further at kaz's words, remaining still under his attention. it warms her through, because at one time, inej would have doubted him. now, she knows kaz would do anything, anything, to ensure her happiness and safety. including giving up ketterdam for her, which he had. nearly, anyway, until he had figured it out and saved their necks.

she does laugh, though, at his last line, and inej tilts her head to kiss the palm of his hand, amused. ]

Even thirty million kruge?

[ teasingly. ]

Even thirty million kruge.

[ He affirms with a small catch of breath, as she kisses his palm. Kaz hasn't worn his gloves for a long stretch of time and so, the sensitivity has lessened over time. But, the skin there is still softer and more sensitive than hands would normally be. Her lips brushing along the lines there send a shiver through him.

In return, he gently tilts her face so he can kiss the curve of her smile. Twice. And a third time, for good measure. With restraint, he finally moves to lie next to her, affectionately nosing at her temple. His hand settles on her midriff, thumb tracing the subtle stitching on the front of the shirt. ]

If I'm not up early, the hens are going to riot.

[ And as much as there's always the allure of taking this further, to keep kissing her until their lips are swollen and they're out of breath, he is admittedly drained from the long travel here. The emotional fretting he's been doing on the days leading up to the journey is catching up to him as well. So, he tucks the urge to keep going in his pocket for later, when he isn't tapped out in a sense.

This feels nice, though, to just cuddle up with the woman he loves, the world narrowed down to the two of them in their cozy bubble. ]

[ the kisses soon subside into kaz settling down, clearly intent on sleeping rather than doing anything further. which is fine, honestly; he was tired, and inej knows he hasn't slept very well in the days leading up to their trip. so she snuggles in next to him, pressing a final kiss to his cheek before tucking her head underneath his chin, properly entangling herself in him. as is her want. ]

I think if you get up early, you are going to riot.

[ amused, though she makes a note to herself that she will rise even earlier, to make sure he has coffee, at the minimum. an arm loops around his middle as she tucks herself close, letting her eyes drift to sleep. ]

But I will get up with you, to ensure the ladies of the house do not starve.

[ There's a smile lingering on his mouth when she kisses his cheek and then settles in to get comfortable. Her head is pillowed on his shoulder, legs slung over his thighs, the whole side of her body pressed up against his. As soon as she's done fidgeting, he can feel his muscles relax into her hold, a euphoric sense of peace blanketing him. ]

I will feel somewhat riotous. [ Kaz admits, tone both amused and sheepish in turn. Early mornings were not his favorite time of day. Most of his life had been spent seeing the dawn only because he'd managed to stay up through the night. The Barrel didn't sleep until late, past midnight, and even when the clubs wound down, the small hours were best to accomplish his many schemes.

To say that had been an odd adjustment when he'd arrived in Ketterdam would be an understatement. After all, they're back where he'd grown up, where people woke with the first crowing of the roosters and the shy peek of the sun over the horizon line washed everything in a fragile white light. Despite being too young to do the more hard labor on the farm, the three of them had always been up early, with his Da kindly shaking his boys awake and plying them with promises of a hot breakfast. ]

Very magnanimous of you. I'm sure their highnesses will show their appreciation by trying to peck at your shins.

[ Fussy little creatures that they are. Still, something about having fed the chickens for so many years has imbued the habit with a strange kind of affection. These aren't the ones he and Jordie and Da named–those hens are long gone–but the familiarity is...comforting, somehow.

Shaking his head minutely, he focuses on the heat radiating out from Inej, the sound of her steady inhale-exhale, trying to get his mind to let go of the racing thoughts. For once, luck is on his side, as the next thing he's aware of is the watery morning light creeping in through the windows. It washes the entire room out in a pale blue-white, a humid but crisp chill hanging in the air. He doesn't need to look to know Inej has already woken, the blankets on her side left in a crumple.

With nothing to keep him in the bed, he gets up, going through the motions of making himself at least somewhat presentable. Visitors weren't a frequent occurrence out this way, but, it was still possible. Neighbors could drop by unannounced, asking after fresh eggs or to borrow a cup of flour.

Hair sufficiently tamed and dressed more appropriately for the burgeoning spring, he makes his way downstairs, the tap of his cane louder than usual in the quiet of the house. As predicted, Inej is already in the kitchen, snugly swathed in an oversized jumper he's fairly sure used to be his. Making his way over, he puts a gentle hand on her waist as he drops a kiss to the part in her hair. ]

Good morning. [ His words are slightly muffled, spoken into the crown of her head. ] Sleep well?

[ long years of living directly beneath kaz brekker's haunt within the attic has gotten her used to the sound of him moving around. so when she distantly hears a shuffle above her, she smiles to herself as she flips the eggs within the pan. soon, the shuffling is accompanied with the tap of a cane, and inej is impressed -- both with her own estimations on when kaz would rouse himself, and that kaz had actually done so.

she doesn't look over as he comes to her side, presses a kiss to the top of her head. she is, indeed, wearing an old jumper of his -- it was cool, and it kept her snugly warm. once she's certain the eggs are cooking nicely, she tilts her head back against his shoulder with a warm smile, amused. ]

Good morning. [ and she stands on her toes just a bit, to kiss his jaw before returning her attention to the breakfast at hand -- eggs, plucked neatly from the sleeping hens in the coop adjacent to the house without their knowledge, some toast within the oven. a light affair, as inej knows kaz will want to give her a tour after they are done. something, she imagines, he both is legitimately looking forward to and wants to get over with as soon as possible. ] I did sleep well. [ nice and cozy. she tilts her head toward the counter, where a pot of coffee is already made. ] Come back to life, hm?

[ then they can discuss the rest of their day. ]

Edited 2024-10-12 22:32 (UTC)

[ She brushes a soft kiss to the line of his jaw and he smiles, the expression making it all the way to his eyes. It may be earlier than he would ever like to be awake and moving around, but, her presence makes it all the more bearable. ]

I'm alive. [ Mostly. He'll feel better when there's caffeine in his system. So, he does move over to the fresh pot of coffee, taking a couple of stoneware mugs down from the cupboard. Inej isn't usually one for coffee, preferring her tea, but he pours some for her at the lack of tea leaves, fixed on the sweeter side. A bit indulgent himself, he adds a teaspoon of sugar to his cup, stirring idly as she shimmies an egg onto the spatula to flip it.

The light in the kitchen is still dimmer this early, though the rays of the sun are slowly starting to shift from white to a pale butter yellow. Once it was properly over the horizon, the chill morning dew clinging to the air would start to dissipate and make the temperature more pleasant. His past merges with the present again, as he's sure will happen the entire time they're here, the memory of his Da standing in the same spot–at the same time of day–as Inej is scratching at his brain. For a few long moments, he simply watches her, swallowing around the odd déjà vu. Deciding he's idled too long, he pulls his gaze away, striding over to the worn and well-cared for table to begin setting it.

As she comes over with the pan of eggs, he squints out towards the bay window, trying to determine whether the clouds were indicating an overcast. Between the streaky grey-white wisps, the sky is a clear gradient of gradually lightening indigo; probably a clear day. ]

Likely won't have time to see Lij proper until tomorrow. [ He says, turning his attention away from the window. ] The grounds aren't extensive but, they're big enough.

[ There's an unspoken question on his face as he looks at her: does she want to see it all? Not like fields are the most exciting thing, even if he has history in nearly every crumb of dirt surrounding the house, extending out to the lake and a bit of the tree line behind it. He'd understand if she'd rather stay in and leave him to his own melancholy. ]

[ he's lost in his own head when she approaches with the food, though he does speak. his mind isn't focused in the present, though, seeking out next steps on how to deal with... all of this. but as she slides toast and eggs onto a plate for him, she hums to herself in thought, reading the question easily.

he's giving her an out. why, inej has no idea. well, she does. he doesn't want to burden her with whatever is in his head, but that was the the purpose of being here, wasn't it? to shoulder it with him. to carry it.

so she simply smiles, settling in across from him with her own coffee (appropriately sweet, which she appreciates), watching kaz over the rim of the cup. ]

Then I suppose we had better get started exploring, then.

[ her tone is warm and gentle, along with a quiet reassurance. she was going to see it with him, or he was not going at all. ]

Where do you want to start?

[ Of course her answer is simple. And of course she wouldn't take the out he'd built into his question. Really, he should know this about her by now, that she was willing to be there for every painful step he took as he peeled his armor off and re-learned how to walk without it. There wouldn't be the horrible pity in her eyes as he shook the rust off of metaphorical joints he hasn't used in years.

Still, he supposes it's habit, to put up something like a defense, just in case the other person decided to take the knife he'd given them and stab it into his soft underbelly.

It's with immense gratitude he reaches over to cup his hand over hers, though, giving her fingers a thankful squeeze. ]

By the time we're done with the hens, should be bright enough out to take the path to the lake. [ Start the furthest out and work their way back in, he thinks, is the better option. Because as they began their trip towards the house again, the memories would be less cheerful in ways. Or rather, heavily burdened by the grief that washed out the happier times more often than not. ]

I can show you the tree Jordie climbed on a dare and broke his arm. [ Despite the injury, it is a funny memory, something that has him smiling lightly as he sips his coffee. ]

[ she returns the squeeze of his fingers with a warm smile, letting him take his time to explain the plan for the day. all of this was going to be ugly... to an extent. it would only be as ugly as kaz would allow it to be. he mentions jordie easily enough, but inej knows that the closer they stray to more painful memories, the more difficult this was going to be.

she looks amused at the story, idly turning his hand over so his palm faces upward. she idly traces the lines in his palm, fingers tracing along indentations that she has long since memorized. if you didn't know kaz, you would think he did work meant for soft hands. a banker, or a lawyer. someone who didn't get their hands dirty, or didn't know the meaning of hard work for survival. a far contrast to her own calloused hands, roughened by knives and rope.

the thought amuses her further, before she says: ]

I want to see it.

[ see everything, really. she feels starved for information, here; wants to soak up everything possible, for how long it has taken her to arrive at this moment. because this is all she wanted of him, wasn't it? for him to trust her with the broken pieces. being here, it was hard to imagine how kaz brekker was formed from such a peaceful and idyllic place. but lost boys don't wind up in ketterdam without reason; she suspects she'll learn soon enough as to why they found their way into pekka's grasp. ]

Show me?

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject